Any app is a dating app if you're Indian enough

I hate my AWS professor, he just sucks at explaining the practical part of AWS. How one can make it completely dull, I just don't get - explain almost anything the right way and I am fascinated. I will also say the subject is taught online and I really do not jive well with online teaching outside of self-paced things. He has on one particular occasion given us a homework that he took from an Indian guy online that was impossible to do in our scenario, with AWS Academy student accounts, and we protested by not doing it and calling the professor to the attention of the administration. We'll see how it turns out by the Friday...

A german blogger i occasionally read wrote something about finding the correct programming font for the personal liking and linked this:

http://app.programmingfonts.org/

Seems kinda fun. I am currently using Fira Code but "Cousin" looks kinda interesting.

Wanted to share

How does programming influence a programmers daily life?

1. We start counting from zero.

2. We observe software more than using it. What is the algorithm behind it? Which Data structure is used?

3. Greeting people with "hello world".

4. Assigning variables to people.

Fucked up the Ubuntu partition while upgrading to 18.04 . Lost data. Fucked up the system further by doing random stuff and seeing what happens. Had to reinstall. Redo the customisations. Install all the ides and softwares.

That was fun. 🙂

Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.

"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"

"Uh... look at my beard"

"What"

"Just look at this beard!"

"Uh.... OK"

"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"

"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"

"You don't have to lie"

She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.

"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"

"Yeah"

"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."

She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"

Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."

Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.

Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"

"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"

Joanna: "No I already took care of it"

"How?"

"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"

Me: "I do miss shaving though"

ÆÃÅĀÀÁÂÄ!!!
I'm so thrilled!! I am not a GUI person & I am rly rly slow & bad when it comes to minor changes on that part..
But today I finally finished GUI, client logic, server side logic & db shiiit for some audit interface I was making.. ..from scratch, meaning it wasn't some changese here & there, no copy pasta no nothin.. I did the whole thing by myself..did a lot of things for the first time & it didn't take me ages!! Wiiiiii!!! Having a total 'I iz so proud of myself' moment!! // I usually am not the boasting/confident/happy with myself type..

My younger sister has to write a story for her assignment and she isn't getting any ideas . So I suggested this :
A story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas ,so he writes a story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas ,so he writes a story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas... till 200 words.

Haha yes.

Opens devRant
Reads a few ultrageeky rants
Doesn't understand them, bamboozled
Realises there is so much to be learnt
Goes back motivated

Meme : an element of a culture or system of behaviour passed from one individual to another by imitation or other non-genetic means.
Here you go

Does any one of you have doggos or cattos in your office campus ?
It must be so AMAZING for reducing stress at work.

1. Buy boxes of orange juice, almost past their expiry date.
2. Put boxes on the hot office windowsill for a few weeks.
3. Cool down juice in fridge.
4. "Hey dear coworker, would you like a refreshing juice box on this hot spring day?"
5. Watch coworker retch and vomit, spitting blue-grayish juice over his desk, crying: "Why would you give me old moldy juice without checking the date?"
6. "Do you remember when you told me you didn't have time for unit tests? THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS, DAVE, THIS IS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENS WHEN YOU DEPLOY UNTESTED CODE.... NOW FINISH YOUR JUICE!"

I haven't posted anything in a long time. Let me change that. I'm doing normal. Just busy. University and all. Seems like stuff is going to get a bit interesting. I can't say anything beyond that.

I hope everyone's alright.

Our university's way of telling us our fate.

"Interpret your result"

Spent 4h+ debugging my code (it was late)...only to realise that my code was not buggy, but the fuckup in design was in the original part I didn't change..FML..

Terminal theme on DuckDuckGo : 😍

First algo strikes 'again' for me 😂😂😂

Duuude!? What the fuck?!
First weekend off so I can slack around & now this?! O.o
I don't know what I expected.. I didn't evem do anything to it (yet)..

I think my IE knows it's crap & is trying to hide.. xD
Actually took me a second to locate the little mofo on the desktop O.o

Ohe yeah, this is actual window size it opened itself in.. the picture is not cropped.. only magnified when uploaded..

I was signing up on Twitch...
I was in a hurry...
Goddamn that CAPTCHA...
After fucktillion attempts...
I came to terms with the fact that I am a robot...

I can finally afford a doggo atleast on devRant !!!!
So happ !!!

The inside of my coffee cup looked too pretty,had to stop to admire and click.

Wish my phone had a better camera.

Meeting with asshole partner company CEO at restaurant.

Me: "I'm a bit worried about the bugs in your API. There are some ways to retrieve privacy sensitive info from public endpoints"

CEO: "Well, we're a rapidly growing startup!"

Me: "Uh... so?"

CEO: "So... Move Fast and Break Things! Priority is to improve our API further, and we'll fix bugs as they show up"

Me: "Maybe you should stop trying to emulate Zuckerberg in your management style. You know that even Facebook themselves admitted that their slogan was a retarded mistake"

Waiter shows up at table. CEO orders some overly expensive fish salad.

CEO: "Well, they have done something right... they're worth billions"

Waiter asks me: "And you sir, have you made your choice?"

Me: "Do you serve popcorn?"

CEO: "Popcorn for lunch?"

Me: "No, for your congressional hearing"

No, dear M$, I can't tell you if sth is helpful after spening 5s on page, especially if 4s were spent loading the content!!!

Hmm... That's 2 yrs from now.. o.O
Mmm...ok... Keep the job, rewrite old crap (I mean code) I'm maintaining & rock at it..
Personal issues wise, get married get own flat/house & hopefully get back to climbing at least on weekly basis.. Ooh & maybe a doggo & kitteh.. xD

P.S. maybe find a phone that will outsurvive me.. or at least survive me for more than 3 months.. :/

100% Real. And it's not even the worst on the site.

Overheard a phone call of a collegue:

Person on phone (P): okay so how do I upload the code?
Colleague (C): well you could use filezilla for example
P: oh... okay... yeah.... So how does that work?
C: you said earlier that you were going to hire a more technical person, a developer, to develop this wordpress side, maybe he/she could help you out with this?
P: I am that developer.

C: 😶😐

Hmm...

PHP > all other languages

jQuery > JavaScript

IE > Chrome

Windows > all other OSes

Android > iPhone

Uplay > Steam

*grabs popcorn*

When you're feeling extra 'peechy' debugging coworker's crap.. I mean code..

Bonus: Anyone get's the reference?? Might have spelled it wrong.. But fuckit! I no longer care.. :\