This is the problem with iot

The instructions to install on Windows...

Not easy to spot

The 3 greatest things in life:

1 A great orgasm

2. A great shit

3. Fixing a major bug before anyone notices.

Work directly on a production system and get all 3 experiences simultaneously.

found somewhere

Client: I know other developers who would do the same and much more for much less.

Me: I am glad you chose to work with me instead.

Client: I mean I like the site but I still feel that the development process has taken longer than it should have.

Me: Well, it is within the time frame I had said I would be able to have the first version of the site running. I have also implemented quite a number of new features that we had not earlier agreed on.

Client: I think I'll pay (quotes less than 20% of the total cost ).

Me: That is less than the amount that you were to pay as the first instalment ages ago!!

Client: I mean I like the site, but I think it still lacks the X factor. I want ...*goes on to mention other features*

Me: While I take pride in making my clients happy, I believe this process should be mutually beneficial. You are constantly making requests for new features but are making no attempts to meet your end of the agreement.

Client: FYI, there are people begging me for this job.

Me: *Takes down the site.* I wish you all the best, I hope the other developers are up to your standards.

Client: *Literally ignoring the fact that I just quit*. I want (makes more requests).

I am simply going to ignore this one!!!!

On point.....

At Once I thought ...

They lack inventory management

Triggered

That moment you realise Typescript is not called Typescript because it has types but because of the immense amount of typing you have to do to get anything done...

Who has taken this!

BOYS ITS HERE

WE FINALLY GOT SPACE VACUUM IN PHOTO

3 billion devices run Java.......

Remote desktop

++ contributions in the last year

It looks like that the bikes in our gym are running with Android.

The Database Manifesto is arriving soon....

Discussing with a senior, how it actually looks... XD

Note to self: avoid eyeglasses when pixelated.

Me, whenever I attempt to use eyeliner...

(real talk, this is why I don't bother trying to use eyeliner)

I demand 8-bit avatars to stay

I look like fuehrer in 8 bit avatar...

Petition for the pixelated avatars joke to be a permanent feature.

Vote for yes
Down vote for no

:)

Ok......

Today I had my first decent pull request accepted.

It wasn't the biggest problem, but it made a chrome extension not work, and the author and other users couldn't figure it out.

The author seems very chill and called me 'the man' and offered me a drink.
It felt nice.

Customer: IT is completely useless! I’m getting PORN ADS on my work computer!? This is ridiculous!!!

Friend: Oh that’s not good, perhaps your computer has a virus of some sort let me take a look!

Friend takes a look and sees that the porn ads were all provided by google ad service, they weren’t related to a virus.

Friend: so, you don’t have a virus, but so that you know google gathers metrics on the sites you visit so that it can target ads at you better. Looks like that’s what’s happening here.

Customer: .............

Programmers...

Wont happen

Please contact your optician. Hahahahaha