Things that are no big deal but piss me off endlessly:

People who can't mute their mic in online meetings.
We don't need to hear your breathing, the constant "hmm"s, or the conversation of your room mate who doesn't use a headset and instead yells into the telephone on speaker mode all the time

Software engineer

I actually lent a girl an umbrella yesterday which takes the total number of girls I've made wet this year to -1.

what you think about that?

My mother seems to disengage her brain when using a computer, so you must give instructions in exacting detail...

Me: Close that window.
Mom: Um, ok?
Me: ... Click the little red button at the top left...
MS Word: Save document? Yes / No
Mom: ... Now what?
Me: Well, do you want to save that?
Mom: Yes! ...
Me: ... so... click Yes...

... and I die a little more inside...

i just love this one.

#10yearchallenge

True that~~

Go big or go home.

A good thing to share for now :- Artificial Intelligence neural networks !

Under settings, we made a checkbox labeled “Run Program Faster”. The state was saved but it didn’t do anything.

We turned it “on” when people said things were slow. Usually they were happy and no one complained the “run faster” option wasn’t working.

1. Forgot my password.
2. Clicked "Forgot" password button.
3. Received my forgotten password as plain text in my email

When the cursor is in quantum superposition

After spending a few months on this site, what strikes me the most, is how unhappy a lot of programmers are.

It kind of makes me sad to see so many of you struggle with office politics bullshit everyday.

I have a confession to make.

I've never had a programming job, or freelanced, yet I have made a very comfortable living with programming and marketing for the past 20 years.

I make my living by finding niches where there is shit software, and creating a better alarm clock.

The first 5-10 years of doing this, I worked my ass off (throughout my twenties)
But during most of my thirties, I barely had to
work to keep it all up. I get residual income still
from stuff I did 10 years ago.

I'm curious if anyone at all would be interested in learning how to do this, quitting their job, for example, or, just having the freedom to write your own code without answering to anybody but your own customers. Many of whom you never have to talk to, they go to your site, they buy, and rarely ever send emails (if you do it right)

Everybody here has knowledge that is so bankable, yet they seem to just surrender to
asshole bosses and clients. It doesn't have to
be like that.

If you'd be interested in this, please ++ this.

I'm thinking of creating an online course about creating and marketing your own software, specifically for programmers like you guys. and girls.

I genuinely just want to see if there's interest. I hope that's ok.

I can so relate to this, though the scenarios are different. Makes me mad.😾

Been looking around ways to improve devrant's user experience a little, Idk whether you guys like it or not.. Just a suggestion 😂

Tips for people new to programming

1. Start counting from zero
2. Trees are upside down, root's probably at the top
3. Warnings are usual, go rogue!

What more? 😂

How to ignore it and deliver your project :D

Found this in the underground going home from work

Me: double taps a rant to upvote.

Popup: Hint. You can double tap a rant to upvote.

Umm, sure. Thanks..

Being paid to rewrite someone else's bad code is no joke.

I'll give the dev this, the use of gen 1,2,3 Pokemon for variable names and class names in beyond fantastic in terms of memory and childhood nostalgia. It would be even more fantastic if he spelt the names correctly, or used it to make a Pokemon game and NOT A FUCKING ACCOUNTANCY PROGRAM.

There's no correspondence in name according to type, or even number. Dev has just gone batshit, left zero comments, and now somehow Ryhorn is shitting out error codes because of errors existing in Charmeleon's asshole.

The things I do for money...

What's your favorite browser? mine is chrome.

This is hilarious 😂🤣🤣

True story

Do you as a developer use
1. Noise cancelling headsets
2. Music
while working?

If music, what kind or genre?
Personally, I listen a lot to Electronic Ambience/Chillstep.

Fuck old farts trying to enslave us by censoring internet,
fuck socialism,
fuck globalization,
fuck cloud services,
fuck city surveillance,
fuck internet surveillance,
fuck RFID that enslaved animals,
fuck IoT constantly looking at our life,
fuck artificial intelligence.
It’s becoming fucking nightmare.
Time to make tools to fight against technology and people that intrude our life with this shit.
Where the fuck is John Connor ?

Sitting in a germans-only company on a germans-only talk, listening to german presenters trying to speak english.
"...And sis is a Integräitontest, witsch is verry important [...] sis here is my sird maven plugin..." schnitzel.

Why for god sake do you funky hip devs mean you have to speak english to me?! Especially if you are simply not able to?

Some of my favorites:
My english is not se yellow from se egg but I hope you understand me.
Sänk ju for trävveling wis deutsche bahn.

Someone has similiar sentences?

After years of game dev!

Is it ???? 😂

Love Factorio?

Meet Satisfactory. Take my money I have to try this.

www.satisfactorygame.com