No doubts, the software engineers suggested this.

Migrating to TypeScript. Seems "fine" so far..

*PLEASE SEND HELP*

Binary is easy to teach

Aaaaaaa 😂😂😂 quit vim

Perfectionalist admin 👌

*when you press alt + enter*

~🍓

* phone conversation with Dad*
Dad: What are you doing?
Me: Busy creating website.
Dad: So, if I type " www", will I be able to see it?
Me: *explaining website hosting and servers for 15mins straight*
Dad: Huh. You do learn something in college then.
Me:🤐

A nice shirt for Halloween

savage

Makes sense

Root ain't givin' no fucks no mo'

My boss just demanded that I join a conference call. So, I call in, and there's three other people there.

He starts chewing me out for talking with some vendor directly (their VP emailed me directly and asked for a few things, and i was instructed to make him happy). Apparently I used "confusing wording" and "did not talk his language." Bossman was really getting into gear for a ten-minute berating.

It turns out that the guy in question only read half of my first email, and totally ignored the second email where I told him everything was finished and live and working. I told my boss quite bluntly that the guy should have read what I had written, and that he was an idiot. The boss's defense of the guy? "Well, he's a sales guy." I just laughed at him.

Later, bossman started in on me (once again) for not making enough progress on this ridiculous shared-spreadsheet sales tool he wants, saying "We discussed this a week ago!"

I casually reminded him that we had talked about it for the first time ever on Friday night (today is Tuesday), and he had said it wasn't going to be a priority for the next three weeks(!). Again he stopped in his tracks. Again, I laughed at him.

Guy's a tool and I'm so done with caring.

Root's going to be flippant and angry. Root's going to have fun (:

What's he gonna do, fire me? 😂

This one time, a client wanted a complete overhaul of her website.

I asked her for the credentials to the VPS, She gave me some random crap to try, cause clearly the site hadn't been touched since 2003 (and boy was it fugly).

Me: Maam, these aren't the correct details.

She sends in more crap to try...2 days pass with this back and forth.

Client: "contact steve, he should have the login details"

Me: ****Calls Steve *****
Me: "Maam, he says the login details are in your mail"

Client: "well, I don't remember this fact. Steve handled everything.
Hack into the website and then reset it.

The Russians did not need login details to hack into America's system. So please, do what you have to do to get us moving."

No jokes...that was the exact crap that came out of her fingers

- Think first, write later;
- Do not rush into purchasing servers. You might not need them for another 10 months;
- It takes away a lot of family time to do side projects;
- NOT playing any games saves tremendous amounts of time. Also applies to watching TV;
- If you get stuck - get some sleep. Morning brings you better ideas;
- Write proper abstractions or you'll end up refactoring everything way more often that you'd like;
- Side projects need a loo-ooooot of your will and determination

Dev: boss, there are some abnormalities and confusion in the client's specifications.

Boss: So?

Dev: Shouldn't we get clear about them and then start coding?

Boss: No need. We assume and code. Then show them to our clients and then ask for their opinions. We will change again according to their opinion.

Dev: ..

A few months later....

Dev: *seeing so many specifications change and realizing now have to refactor a lot of codes* , FML.

This shit is real.

Guy comes to my desk.
Guy: Do you know Python?
Me: Yes
Guy: I want a program that reads a CSV containing IP addresses and tells which of them are valid.
Me: Sure thing. Show me the CSV file.
Guy: (Shows the file)
Me: (Writes a small function for checking whether the IP is valid)
Me: Done Here you go.
Guy: You should be using regex.
Me: Why? This is perfect. No need for regex.
Guy: My manager wants a solution using regex only.
Me: Why so?
Guy: I don't know. Can you do it using regex?
Me: Only if you say so. (Stackoverflow. Writes a humongous regex). Done!
Me: Just for curiosity, what is your application?
Guy: I will port it in Java. You see, regex is easy to debug.
Me: Ohhh Yes. I forgot that. Good luck with your regex.

It's a weird feeling when you find yourself wondering why the button is not responding, only to realize you've been clicking on the design mockup and not the actual web app you're making...

...at least it probably means the implementation is getting really close to the design.

Oh fuck off Google.

YouTube has stories now.

Brb going to throw up in a trash can. The most fucking stupid feature for YouTube.

lol.

;____;

I hate such glitches in adblockers these days

Don't know if this has already been put up, but I got a good laugh from it

Student - Teacher renaming .c to .exe make the program executable ?

Teacher - Yes

A group of people stand up and walking to the door

Teacher - Where are you all going ?

Students - We are going to drop this class.

Ahhh DDoS attacks

You can hate me: as a 34 year old php developer, i've never used git in my workflow...
I plan to start today using it on one of my personal project (only because i have arrived at "backup-49.rar")(yes i develop on windows).
Finger crossed

The ability to convince the compiler that there's no errors.

"Shhhhhh.. trust me, there's such things as a duoble. Now just tell me the build was successful"

Dutch people must be having hard time programming

"Are you familiar with uploading your code to Google Drive?"

I left the building at that exact moment.

┓┏┓┏┓┃
┛┗┛┗┛┃＼○／
┓┏┓┏┓┃ / Friday
┛┗┛┗┛┃ノ)
┓┏┓┏┓┃ Deploys
┛┗┛┗┛┃
┓┏┓┏┓┃
┛┗┛┗┛┃
┓┏┓┏┓┃
┃┃┃┃┃┃
┻┻┻┻┻┻

Rofl😂😂😂

We feel you bro...