Sometimes I daydream about one of my projects to become successful. Then I realize that Google Chrome has 56.000 open issues and I regret

I am from the future and Php takes over everything

Printers.

*deep breath*

*scream*

I don't know a lot of people in other market segments who have zero fear of losing their job. Since I discovered that my coding skills are marketable, I have not lost a night of sleep over job security.

I'm very happy with my current job, but the privilege of rarely having to feel uncertain about income is incredibly liberating.

Team lead dismisses my request for promotion to senior, "need more experience", 3 hours later get job offer for senior position

Array Indexing

This answer is too accurate...

Things I regret immediately after doing it:
1) Masturbation
2) Overeating
3) git commits

I'll take my degree now pls

Got this from a recruiter:

We are looking for a **Senior Android Developer/Lead** at Philadelphia PA

Hiring Mode: Contract

Must have skills:

· 10-12 years mobile experience in developing Android applications
· Solid understanding of Android SDK on frameworks such as: UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation, Network Programming, etc.
· Good Knowledge on REST Ful API and JSON Parsing
· Good knowledge on multi-threaded environment and grand central dispatch
· Advanced object-oriented programming and knowledge of design patterns
· Ability to write clean, well-documented, object-oriented code
· Ability to work independently
· Experience with Agile Driven Development
· Up to date with the latest mobile technology and development trends
· Passion for software development- embracing every challenge with a drive to solve it
· Engaging communication skills

My response:

I am terribly sorry but I am completely not interested in working for anyone who might think that this is a job description for an Android engineer.

1. Android was released in September 2008 so finding anyone with 10 years experience now would have to be a Google engineer.
2. UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation are all iOS frameworks
3. Grand Central Dispatch is an iOS mechanism for multithreading and is not in Android
4. There are JSON parsing frameworks, no one does that by hand anymore

Please delete me from your emailing list.

Testing my System ..?

After seeing this app on the play store, I've officially lost faith in humanity.