Dear Managers.....

those kids...

Modern development methodologies:

SDD - sales driven development.
TDD - torture driven development.
BDD - bug driven development.
CPDD - copy&paste driven development.

Basically most of the python scripts I've seen.

Probably been posted here, so I apologize if it's a repost, but gave me a solid laugh, so...

I really want my dev team to ask me to go to happy hour so I can suggest meeting at Foo Bar. Though, that may be why no one's asked..

Scrum:

Boss to designer: sadly the green logo was not chosen and we will go with the purple one.

D: oh good choice, but why green was discarded?

B: green is not enough criptocurrency related.

Me: in my mind: how a color is crypto related... What wut? Procceed to do weird faces, twitch and spasm while I try to sort this out.

Boss see me and beat me (gently!) with an inflatable chicken.

Guys. Green is not crypto.

Stole this from my friend's status

Browser Toolbar is greater than life. Third party apps are dangerous.

As usual before sleeping i set a timer for shutdown cuz i use my hotspot to surf devrant in bed before sleeping.

My roommate( lets call him AB) sees me writing the command.

AB: what are you doing?
Me: setting a timer to shutdown my computer.

AB: oh nice i want that too... is it just a linux thing?
Me: nope u can do it on windows.. just search the cmd command on google and u are good to go.

AB: you do it. You search.
Me: huh? Why would i do that? Bitch it is simple just google "cmd command shutdown timer" and open the first result.

AB: *extremely dissapointed face and starts searching* i dont understand anything.
Me: AB! The instructions literally explain everything! I can see!!

AB: you are good at computers, u are a computer engineer (im just a second year student)
Me: fuck off *i go to sleep*

Next day i learned that he did it after i left him, and that it did shutdown but he wasnt done with his work and he was too lazy to google how to cancel it.... JUST GOOGLE DAMMIT!!!

Freaking genius dev made a system access password @$$Monk3y1

Had to share that with a vendor...on a conference call

How to send accurate feedback

Where total size is 440 MB

Such innovation, much practical..

Almost miss seeing these on my parents screens.

Turn water into coffee.
IT Jesus

Moved out a few months ago. Love my setup. Dual monitor at desk and a big ass TV + laptop for when I want the couch. Coffee to top it off.

Haskell...

My most emotional moment was when I wrote my first android app (it was a calculator but it looked cool) and started it on my phone. I was 15 at the time (this was 6 years ago) but those were my first steps in programming

My disk isn't corrupted, it's just so secure that even I can't access it

why the hell should i get 10 ++ to build an avatar

it should have been a lot easier 😎

Remembering last year tweet...
https://twitter.com/ajlobster/...

All internships should be paid



*me at the morning

- 08:30 Ah, let me sleep juuust more 5 minutes, I even don't need alarm *turn alarm off"
*blink
- nah, I should go
- 10:45 what the...

OMG ever since I started to love Haskell, all nonfunctional languages look ugly, I am getting worse at writing procedural code!

Dont mess with compilers... Just follow there warning...

My girlfriend is learning python and she figured out how to change her environment to dark mode. I'm so proud of her.

When I realize that tomorrow is a holiday 🎆🎊🎉🎇🎈✨🎁🍷🍷🍷🍷🍾🍾🍾🍾🍻🍻🍻🍻🍻🍻🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺

Ohhh tcp

Not a rant, just a tought:

I was thinking, how amazing is to work at software industry, I mean, is there any other field of work where you can start without knowing little to nothing of the thing you are going to work with?
Got hired to work with a friend of mine in his uncle's company, started as a technician, providing support to clients, after that, started coding little windows applications using c#, even tought, I didn't know shit about it, time passed and we needed a mobile application, then when I realized I was already coding for Android in Java even though I didn't know nothing about it too.

It's just, you can do whatever you want if you will... It's amazing! I love doing what I do.