The company FIDO here, has the worst web application. But this here is just hilarious! XD

Google Allo SDK. An SDK that we can use to build bots. [more details]

Visited my parents again today!

Arrived home.

Suddenly my sister starts to talk about the new dutch mass surveillance law and how it's all bad and the possible consequences.

😶😐😮

Normally I'm the one who says that and is told to shut up after a while.

I'm a proud brother!

Every time I read something on computer (which I haven't previously come across), I can't figure out whether it's a l ( small case letter L) or a I (capital case letter l). Worst case is working with passwords. :(

Me. Lack of self-confidence.

When someone touches my screen

Have you tried turning me off and on again, Doc?

Job Ad says "Web Developer". Requested skills were HTML, CSS, PHP & XML. Go to interview & get grilled about my design skills. Web Developer != Web Designer people! Get it together! 🙄🙄🙄

You know you're backend when it took you 30 minutes to program the inner workings of the platform... and 4 days to make it look pretty.

So I barely get home and I see my 10 year old sister in the living room coding with the Xcode Playground, I asked her where she learned how to do that and she said "I just read the books you had." I'm so proud. 😭🤘🏼

The difference between Front End and Back End simplified!

There you go
😂😂😂

My job is so f**king unbelievable.

I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless.
The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on make-up.
She is extremely self-centred and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself.
She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet.
Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10.
I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts.
I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead.
In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work.
He probably hasn't been sober any time in the last ten years, and he's only 22.
He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big f**king dog to work.
Every f**king day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke.
Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing.
Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonald's and Burger King, every single f**king day.

Anyway, I drive these dicks around in my van and we solve mysteries and s**t.

#foreveralone 😓

This is way too true.

You ever look as someone and think "I could replace you with a script."?

I hate programming.
I hate programming.
I hate programming.
IT WORKS!
I love programming.

Be more specific.

"Let's mark every issue a high priority so it all gets done faster."

Does anyone else suddenly lose the ability to type properly as soon as someone is watching/pairing?

Haha 😂

Project manager(noun) - an individual who believes nine women can deliver a baby in one month .

How do you tell HTML from HTML5?

- try it out in Internet Explorer
- did it work?
- no?
- it's HTML5