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Joined devRant on 9/10/2018
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Made a website that can make images like this
Basically you just keep splitting the rectangle and color them
https://txstc55.github.io/draw-rect...
It’s very mobile unfriendly though
Need feedback on what you need, also this is an offline version and I’m planning to make it so that you can do it with your friend, just need to watch more YouTube videos on p2p now17 -
If I were to do-over, I would:
- Know that the world is MUCH bigger then even the largest city in the most populous country, and I get to pick where I'm going. So I'm going where the grass is green and bosses are not allowed to physically assault their employees, thank you very much.
- Do not care for missing or useless requirements, and only deliver the PoC. the requirements will all change the very second a client, BA or boss look at the PoC, anyway. Let them come.
- know that companies will replace you and do not need you, just as you do not need them. fuck their needs and live your own life. If they ask for overnight unpaid overtime, leave immediately and laugh all the way home. -
Same days you just need a duck.
Me: map.get(record.Id)
Code: null
Me: no, map.get(record.id)
Code: null
Me: let's grab this record from the map
Code: null
Me: what the flying fuck, take this fucking ID from this fucking RECORD and find it in THIS god forsaken map.
Code: null
Me:.......
Code: 😉
Duck: did it occur to you the ID exists only AFTER the map is created.
Me: you fucking wha..... oh I'm a dick head.7 -
Let's play a game.
Since using teams for the last two years I've been allowing MS to tap into my life story for work to produce some hilariously scary analytics on my work schedule.
For anyone interested:
https://myanalytics.microsoft.com
Now let's pull some data out and think about wtf is going on here.
Weekly average for "focus" vs "collaboration"
Now this is a % of time you have not being stuck in meetings, calls, ect, based on the pass 4 weeks of data.
I have a 93% collaboration vs 7% focus time - or leave me the fuck alone time.
That's literally 35 of my 38 working hours a week in some kind of call or dealing with emails 😅
Speaking of emails: what in the fuck am I supposed to do with 5,109 emails and 403 calls on teams in a month?
It's like I need a receptionist for this shit.
And on that note, im hitting the rum for the day 🥃🥃🥃4 -
fujioaskl;f;asdfjkl
WHY THE FUCK DOES MY BOSS HAVE ME MOCKING FUCKING RECAPTCHA API RESPONSES? IT'S SO FUCKING STUPID
I CAN'T MOCK THE RECAPTCHA JS METHODS SO I HAVE TO MAKE VALID-LOOKING JSON RESPONSES AND I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING CLUE HOW ANY OF IT FUCKING WORKS
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST THING ANYONE HAS EVER ASKED OF ME (okay, it isn't, but it's pretty damned close.) AND IT'S DURING MY BLOODY PERFORMANCE REVIEW.40 -
Guy: - Why the hell do you keep adding new tests with "TDD" in the commit log? Is this because you're wearing this stupid TDD t-shirt!? You're only supposed to maintain this! There's nothing to develop! Nothing here will ever be test-driven!
Cprn: (turns around)
T-shirt: *Technical Debt Development*6 -
Lead dev walks in:
"Remember what I said about doing dumb shit solutions in languages that no one understands?"
Me: "Yes.....why?"
Him: "That reporting script you did for <x department> needs some modifications and you decided for whatever fucking obscure reason to do it in perl"
Me: "I felt......experimental"
Him: "Well yes, that is cool and all but it needs some modifications as per <X director> and only your dumbass knows perl because you are just too fucking cute aren't ya?"
Me: "You think I am cute??? <insert spongebob blushing meme>"
Him: "I fucking hate it when you write shit in perl"
In my defense, it was a really short fucking script
For clarification: This was a friendly convo even though it doesn't sound like it. He is actually my employee, and a rather close friend, so there is that level of trust and comraderie29 -
Me: 15 years of experience in AWS, DevOps, Architecture, and Security. Current title: "Senior DevOps Manager"
Recruiter: "There are a lot of opportunities, but this one caught my eye, and I thought you'd be interested... Junior Frontend Developer"
If you want to do your job, at least do it half way well. Recruiters can suck, but most are better than that.2 -
I've resigned 3 weeks ago. I have also completed my handover process.
Yesterday I was told that I have to work in the weekend and at night because project delivery date is the following week.
Kindly I responded that I have resigned and working on weekends and late nights won't benefit me in anyway now actually I wasn't benefiting from working on weekends and late nights even before my resignation.
Project manager is pissed off at me.
Oh well, it is what it is 🤷8 -
HR: I’m sure you know what this meeting is about
Dev: My script that converts the name of our 3rd party IT provider in any email thread I reply to with “PooPoo Inc.”?
HR: No, that is a separate meeting
Dev: Ah.4 -
Dev: Hey I need something from Team B
Manager: Ok I’ll get it from them now
Dev: Unfortunately they have the current time blocked off as uninterrupted coding time for the next two hours.
Manager: Yeah that means they’re not occupied by anybody else. It’s the best time to get a hold of them!
Dev: …4 -
PSA.
Bad Managers will, sometimes, abuse imposter syndrome to have you work longer hours. Don't let them.9 -
CSS for JavaScript Developers is my new favorite thing. I’m learning so much about CSS that I never realized before and it’s getting me to think about CSS in different ways.
Unrelatedly, I’ve been doing #catober for #inktober.
Also, I’m still alive. ❤️7 -
Manager: Explain “Kooburrnehteez” to me.
Dev: Well when a mommy server and a daddy server love each other very much…2 -
A teacher from high school.
I finish the assignment early, shit on everyone’s head in terms of speed and performances and this guy first praises me, then slams the keyboard with random chars, letters and weird shit in an application which was supposed to only accept numbers.
“But… the requirements said…”
“I’m your manager and I am dumb af. Trust me, this will happen a lot irl.”4 -
Me: *starts to get into electronics*
Me: *unplugs a few wires while building a project*
Me: Shit, actually, didn't want to unplug those. No worries.
Me: *instinctively reaches for the nonexistent Ctrl-Z*
Me: Oh, that's right. My actions have consequences in the real world.5 -
!rant
Convinced the boss we should move to .NETCore 5 because *future proofing*
and *security*.
Now I get to use records and can use all that fancy syntactic sugars.
Life's good.5 -
Boss: Why are you trying to build the old program?
Me: Because I need to determine behavior of why old program works with data that new program does not.
Boss: Does it affect the output?
Me: No, but...
Boss: STOP! Just filter it.
Me: Okay.
Boss: Go write new fun code, not work on old shit.
Me: Thank you for saving me from myself.
In reference to:
https://devrant.com/rants/4666401/...2 -
Manager: *taps dev on shoulder* We need to do B
Dev: I know, you created a ticket for it yesterday
Manager: Yeah but it hasn’t been done yet. It needs to get done.
Dev: I’m currently working on A which is higher priority
Manager: Ok but B needs to be done too
Dev: I know, it’s next on my board
Manager: I’m just making sure you are aware of it
Dev: I am aware of it, it’s next on the board
Manager: Ok but make sure you do it after A
Dev: Yup it’s next up
Manager: Ok, don’t let anyone distract you
Dev: …9 -
TIL that you can use underscores as a decorative numeric separator in ES 2021 like
const FOURTY_FIVE_MILLION = 45_000_000;
I learned this from some shitty advertisement on a Minecraft economy server where I thought the little shit was just trying to be techy.
Luckily I wasn't actually rude to him because then I would have looked like an ass.5 -
A coworker asked me for help so they could finish their task on time. That meant that I had to be a bit late for one of mine. They blamed me for delaying the whole team because I didn't finish mine on time. 😕11
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How you guys refer to non-devs?
I've started calling them civilians. Apparently calling them peasants is offensive.13 -
Be a nice guy and volunteer for a weekend release that's supposed to be fast.
1. Release team person doesn't have permission to deploy our app
2. Dev that raised the change ticket didn't make sure it was fully approved and usable
-My whole morning go bye bye
-ah fuck it, clean up your own shit, I'm out...
Learn and don't do it again next time... Or not5