Fuck clients!

It's a joke, please come back :(

Warning: This is going to be a long one!

Day 1: Fresh outta grad school. Joined a start-up in silicon valley (50% lower pay than avg salary) . Moved to the bay area and rented a car to travel to work. First day, all excited, drive 35 miles to work.

It's a small company with just 5 people. Greeted by the CEO himself. Asks me to wait outside while he goes speaks with the project manager. In the meantime the office manager asks if I have a copy of my resume.

10 minutes later, the CEO walks out and tell me: "I'm sorry but I don't have a job for you at this time. Please come back after a month". Palms are sweaty, Knees weak, arms are heavy. I feel my heart skipping several beats. As an F1 student I immediately start thinking about my visa status.

I drive back home and try to think what I should do next. Then suddenly the CEO calls me back saying pls come back and we can work something out. I drive back and I'm offered a small spot on a round table with my colleagues. Everyone looks stressed out and sad.

Day 2: Work starts early since we need to collaborate with a team in India. I reach work at 6:00 am hoping my second day is better than the first. Couple minutes into the early morning meeting, the CEO flips out and screams: "I'm going to fucking fire everyone. This fucking thing is taking too long. Just get the fuck out already".

Day 547: I finally quit and joined another start-up :)

Have you guys heard of the term "smart " as in "smart city" or "smart phone"
It actually is:
Surveillance
Marketed
As
Revolutionary
Technology

when youre super busy and your coworker asks for help

Let's make a drinking game!

We will say random words. If there is a JavaScript framework with that name we have to take a shot.

20 minutes later we will need a liver transplant.

Push me
And then just merge me
So I can get that
Merge confliction
Merge confliction

Couldn't say it better myself.

Typical day in IT Support :P

At least they recognize what they're doing...

0. Plan before you code. Document everything. You won't remember either your idea or those clever implementations next week (or next month, or next year...).

1. Don't hack your way through, unless that's what you intend to do. Name your variables, functions etc. neatly: autocomplete exists!
Protip: Sometimes you want to check a quick language feature or a piece of code from one of your modules. Resist the urge to quickly hack in the test into your actual project. Maintain a separate file where you can quickly type in and check what you're looking for without hacking on your project (For example, in Python, you can open a new terminal or IDLE window for those quick tests).

2. Keep a quiet environment where you can focus. Recommend listening to something while coding (my latest fad is on asoftmurmur.com). Don't let anything distract you and throw your contextual awareness out of whack.

3. Rubber ducks work. Really. Talking out a complex piece of logic, or that regex or SQL query aids your mind greatly in grasping the concept and clearing the idea. Bounce off code and ideas with a friend or colleague to catch errors and oversights faster. Read more here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

4. Since everyone else is saying this (and because it merits saying), USE VERSION CONTROL. Singular most important thing to software development aside from planning and documenting.

5. Remember to flout all of the above once in a while and just make a mess of a project where you have fun throwing everything around all over the place. You'll make mistakes that you never thought were possible by someone of your caliber :) That's how you learn.

Have fun, keep learning!

When I die I want whoever wrote this excel program to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one more time.

My company just fired 20 people, and the next day instuted a program so salaried employees have to clock in and out. Of course not to effect our pay, just to keep their paranoid asses breathing down our necks. Also, no clocking in remotely so all the work I do from home won't be taken into account. Fucking micromanaging, ball-licking, scum-fuck, MBA, morons couldn't run a company if their lives depended on it. When will these soul-less, suit-wearing, shit-scarffers learn that treating your employees with respect and valueing actual work over bullshit metrics, is a better business strategy than treating them like fucking sheep to the slaughter. Fml, I gotta find a new job...

The life of a frontend developer

Sometimes, the rants are in perfect alignment. I live for these moments.

Loved the first project at the university. Your game had to load a map from txt file and create a labirynth with a player inside. It shoud include a bird's eye view and FPS-like - all using only console characters. There were some bonus points - for example for animation or built-in map editor. (language was C)

I love to work in pubs/bars, this special kind of noisy environment works so well for me. I even go "into the zone".

Lets talk about this. Is anyone else the same? Just curious.

These are my 6 reasons:

0) Beer. 🍺
1) None of the activity in a bar actually interests to me, if you know what I mean. In my house, every single noise/movement will get my attention.
2) After some time all the noise blends into a kind of "homogeneous hearing blurb". Like a mantra. Maybe there are even white/pink/brown noise benefits (guess).
3) I go to places where I enjoy the music and atmosphere.
4) I like bars and pubs anyways. I feel good in these places.
5) Beer. 🍺

"be strong" I whispered to my wifi signal... #lol

I need dating advice but everyone I know would just tell me to use ISO 8601...

Colleagues improvising themselves "Evangelists of everything" but continuously asking me how to do things.

Now you can go ask there.

You can work from anywhere... anywhere in the world!

Hmmm... Yeah, right! But not when management likes warm bodies at the office.

I hate, hate, absolutely HATE having to travel to work, spending at least 45min to an hour in traffic just to get to work! 😤😡 And then rinse and repeat to get home... which means I'm up at 5:30 every morning to be at work by 7:30, only to get home past 18:00 - traffic permitting! *sigh* 😩

Most important phrase I learnt. "Can it wait till tomorrow?" Keep you work life balance healthy.

We tested each and every setter and getter, what can go wrong with integration?

Best advice

Time to stop reading this article anyway!

This is what working from home means in Argentina (that's a mate (pronounced mah theh)).

Halloween.

How I've decided to answer the "can you hack" question from here on in...

"Can you show me how to hack this account please?"

"Sure, you'll need a hammer, a blow torch, chloroform, some pliers and couple of bottles of really pure vodka!"

"What the hell?!"

"Oh, it's so much quicker to just extract a password from a person, than it is to break into a system, I'm not exactly trained in inflicting pain on the human body, but I'm sure you'll be able to figure it out through trial and error, good luck!"

No, I'm not hacking.
No Linux is not a movie.
No, you are not a developer because you can put "Hello World" on a website.
No, this isn't a waste of my time.
Yes, I will use it.
Yes, I'll make you a website for free. NOT!
Your phone is both Android and Samsung.
No, what they did in the movie is impossible.
No, I can't predict the stock market.
No, I'm not Mr. Robot, but I know him...

I was dressed up as an UDP packet for the Halloween. I don’t think anyone got it, but I couldn’t tell. #humour

Have a great Halloween :)

Ancient town Asus