He might hunt

JS is too hard for your back-end

Go home Windows, you're drunk.

https://www.devrant.io/rants/199638

By that logic, @dinux should be my ex.:p

I see what you are trying to say Duolingo...

When none of your stuff is working properly and everyone keeps coming over to bug you

when you screw up at a coding interview because you couldn't remember an algorithm you havent used in 7 years.

Interviewer: "Please demonstrate a simple program that outputs hello world in C."

*sweating profusely* me:

C C CCCCC C C CC
C C C C C C C
CC CC CCCC C C C C
C C C C C C C
C C CCCCC CCCC CCCC CC

C C C C CCC C CCC
C C C C C C C C C
C C C C C CCC C C C
C c c C C C C C C C C
Cc cC CC C C CCC CCC

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

- Can you please repair my laptop?
- Ok.... -.-

What do you think, how old is it?

Calls himself web guru... all he does is WordPress

before I found devRant

Have you ever wondered we programmers have so many strong communities.... Stackoverflow, devRant, Reditt, etc...
No other profession has such communities... Why? Why?
Because, we haven't built one for them.... 😂😁

Just realized humans are 0 indexed. Our first year on earth we are 0 years old.

When you implement a 3rd party payment system, and it doesn't work... and their support can't fix the problem... So you debug their code and send them the revised code and they update their GIT repo and update their documenting.

(:/)

Today on devrent.. Ball pics everywhere

(:/)

Its important to read the ToS

Writing some code on a flight

"ARE YOU HACKING?!?!"
"Ugh... Well yeah but not in the way you're thinking"
"Omg I'm getting a flight attendant"

Needless to say I'm still en route because the flight attendant realized that I'm not Mr Robot, nor do I have ZeroCool scribbled on my laptop anywhere.

finally, got enough ++ to set my avatar to 'dushbeg mode'

This is one of my favorite quotes when it comes to programming. So many developer are too eager to start coding instead of spending a bit more time on thinking.

Milk++

*background: client has told account manager he's not paying any more money till his site is done, not only is it the most in-depth WordPress site we've made, but we'll beyond the scope of the signed contract. He sent a few more edits over the weekend which I ignored because we have a team meeting later to discuss he client and where to go from here.

account manager comes in and says he has a call from client looking for me. I tell him that he should probably take a message as I'm not in the mood to be belittled by the client and we have a meeting later to discuss him anyways, we'll call him back.

AM: Come on, he says it'll only take a second and I'll be here so we can do it on speaker.

he transfers the call and we start talking in my office, before the client has even finished his first remark, the AM has left the room. Now we have the least social person in the office talking to the client when both parties are less than happy.

I managed to keep my cool and not tell the client to fuck off, and made sure I was clear about not promising any of his new edits.

Phrases like "that will take time and money" were used a lot.

There may be shots fired at the meeting later.

It's depressing how true this is

Me: "Tech support, how can I help you?"
Them: " I'm not able to log into the website!"
Me: "Okay, what message is it showing when you try to log in?"
Them: "Sir, I am NOT a computer person so I don't know."
Me: "Do you know which web browser you're using?"
Them: "I don't know what that is!"
Me: "Okay, when you want to go on the internet, do you click on a blue E, or a mulicolored circle, or..."
Them: "SIR I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT I AM NOT A COMPUTER PERSON, YOU'RE REFUSING TO THELP ME SO I'M GOING TO HANG UP"

If I learned every spoken and dead language ever created in human history, I still wouldn't have enough swear words to describe how much I loathe SharePoint.

I left the military to become a dev. With no degree and no professional experience. It's safe to say they thought I was crazy. But now it's safe to say they are proud of me.

I've been doing agile wrong my entire life

You can't help it, just lie down and cry.
Maybe you'll choke or drown on your tears and finally end the suffering...

that turned very dark for some very odd reason (sorry 😅)

When the trainee wants to improve your code.

How many developers does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, because developers are sensible and rational people.

When your shower does more commits than you