I know a guy, about 50 years old. He is a self-taught programmer since he was young, and he has always used Visual Basic (never anything newer than VB6).

He once needed to interface with a web application I wrote, so I asked him to send me a POST HTTP request. He didn't know what I was talking about. No notion of REST, sockets, HTTP, nothing.

The he showed me his code. Actually, his codes. He had multiple copies of the project, one for each version, and he even kept multiple variations of the software in different separate folders. He probably doesn't know what "version control" even means.
You think this is messy. You didn't see the actual code (it's a huge application!).

Spaghetti all over the place. Meaningful variable names, what are they? Default names for the controls, like button1, button2, etc, with forms with more than 30 buttons and text fields. This was the most incomprensibile code I have ever seen.

You might think that this guy is just a hobbyist.
No.
He sells his applications. To companies. They are obviously full of errors, but they buy them.

Now, if you're still with me, two questions come into my mind:

- why?? I hate this, because it's impossible to prove to a non-technical person that this is *not* software development.
- how do I know that, to someone else, I am not like him? How can I be sure that I know and will know what needs to be known?

Job Interview for System Administrator

"Do you habe Experience With Servers?"

"Yes, Minecraft Servers, I own one..."

I didn't get the job

Looking at codes I wrote 3 years ago and wondering...

"What the fuck were you thinking!"

I am that colleague that writes bad quality code

What happens when you make your stackoverflow question overly complex...

Asking a developer to repair a printer is like asking a real estate developer to repair a toilet

Client's logic (stolen from the Facebook page "I love programming")

‎The mediocre internship starter pack

I laughed at this..... then I realized something....

It's one of those afternoons...

But it worked yesterday...

!rant

How easy is to get fired from a Dev job? 😛 I'm afraid of that happening every time I introduce a bug lol

Saw a rant a few days ago about hotel WiFi being shitty.

I'm just here to confirm that rant was accurate.

Going live on Friday.
What could possibly go wrong?

🎉😄🔫

I make a lot of money without actually doing anything.

Best way to handle exceptions..

do I need to say something else😂 for the largest blue screen of death

“That regex almost worked, lemme just tweak it a bit–”
*2 hours later*
“Fuck it we’re processing strings character by character with a while loop like granddad did.”

Just printed "Hello World", time to put Python on my resume! 😎

Started learning Python from Java, C#, Objective-C, Swift.
It’s like Rocket Engineer who have to build a car. It’s easy but you have to learn almost everything from the beginning.

Omg visual studio is a piece of SHIT!

I'd rather code java in eclipse than another line of c# in visual studio.

Once you work in IntelliJ other IDE's are awful.

Me: nodejs, how to iterate through a folder

Quora: let me tell you a story , when me and my fath.....

Stackoverflow: -1, please refer to guidelines

Yahoo answer: type command "rm -rf *"

Omegle: m 26 india ....

Cleverbot: const fs = require('fs')
const path = require('path')

function getDirectories (srcpath) {
return fs.readdirSync(srcpath)
.filter(file => fs.lstatSync(path.join(srcpath, file)).isDirectory())
}

then recurrence

me: thx cleverbot

Designer (to the client): Yes it'll be exactly like this mock up after I hand it over to the iOS developer.

Client: Awesome! Looking forward to it.

* Designer goes to developer *

Designer (to developer): Hey these are the new designs for the app, let me know if you have any questions, ok?

Developer: Cool.

* 1 minute later *
* developer goes to designer *

Developer (to designer): How should error messages or notifications look like?

Designer: Oh we should just email those because it won't look good.

Developer: The fuck? And are you going to design this email service too?

Amazing API's and SEX!

Alright people, now that I've got your attention, I'm getting to the point where I need to plan and roll out a solid API for a project. So after reading a lot of the horror stories written here, What are the finer points of what makes an amazing API experience to use and integrate with over a poor one?
And don't say documentation (If you do explain why) 😁

current state:

Love it when people build useful stuff

http://commitlogsfromlastnight.com/

Got confused in my excitement... this is where the stickers go, right?

Today it's Monday. So it's already a shitty day before it starts.
Have a good shitty Monday guys. 👌

Do nothing. Get paid.