1: Get a dog
2: Name dog Sudo
3: Teach Sudo to fetch my mail
4: Invite Linux-friend over
5: Yell "sudo fetchmail"
6: ?
7: Profit

They should reconsider their icon 😅

So adopting this price list. Like right now.

Just applied to a new job with this as my cover letter.
Wish me luck!

After 1,5 months of customer support as a Linux support engineer, I can honestly say:

Fuck wordpress.

This is how you address your 🐱

QA just asked me, why does the website look so ugly and no CSS is working on Internet Explorer
I'm lucky I'm not the web dev lol

*I laughed*
*IE laughed*
*Windows laughed*

Really, I hate this composer / bower / npm shitholes!

Why the hell is my app 300MBs?!? Because that shitty pudding composer decided to download the ENTIRE git including README.md, examples, 5 hours of assembly-giraffe porn, my granny's pajamas and two wraps of kebabs!

How hard is it to define the folder that contains the REQUIRED library so that our project might stay at 5MBs instead of 300?

So I had this conversation with my boss yesterday...

Me: Hey, I found this bug in the other team's code that has a major impact on what we're trying to do. Can you ask them to look into it?

Boss: No, I don't want to be the one who has to tell them there's a major bug in their code. Find a workaround.

M: But... It isn't really a major bug, it just has a big impact on our side of things.

B: Workaround!

Fuck bosses who value how they think they look to other devs over a day of my time. Fuck.

Go home elementary, you're drunk

So I wanted to send an email to Microsoft to request a feature in their new "To-Do" app.

I went to the play store and scrolled down to the end where it says "Send an email to developer".

Clicked on that. And here is the email address:

"noreply@microsoft.com"

😑 😑

Just discovered Lolnein.com, oh hello procrastination!

Source: https://lolnein.com/2017/01/...

Senior dev : * doesn't use git *
Me: you seriously should use git...
Senior dev: * still doesn't use git *
Senior dev: * overwrites production files with old files from other computer *
Senior dev: * talks to boss *
Boss: * gets angry at me *

Finally got around to installing Arch on an actual machine 😀

I went for deepin since i wanted to try something new. I didn't go for any WMs since the whole concept seems complicated to me but i wanna look into it someday.

Anyways, super happy so far. I boot in < 5s from hitting the power button which is super dope ♥️ ♥️. I did have some weirdness with nvidia drivers (as usual on linux lol) but reinstalling it fixed it.

Aww... I think I just had an orgasm

Seriously 😂

Was that prod?

Guys I finally did it!
I installed Mint!
Formatted my entire drive and installed it.

I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE WHO ALWAYS BUY NEW STUFF WHEN THEIR OLD THINGS WORK PERFECTLY FINE!
FFS PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT NOWADAYS! I MEAN, FIRST THEYRE LIKE, oh we need to save the planet bla bla.... THEN THEIR LIKE!
OMFG! NEW IPHONE X WOLOLO MUST HAVE! OMG MY OLD PHONE IS WORKING PERFECTLY FINE BUT ITS THE NEW IPHONE OMG!
I MEAN! COME FUCKING ON! WHAT IDIOTS! IF ITS WORKING, KEEP IT!
#NoHomo

Who the fuck thought this feature would be a good idea?!

*holds the power button because want to reboot*
*presses reboot in the tiny menu*

*walks away to return in about an hour*

"Are you sure you want to reboot?" *cancel and OK buttons*

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

Here's a list of unpopular stuff which I agree with:

1) I love Java more than any other programming language.

2) I love sleeping more than working.

3) I'm not a night owl. I thrive the most during daylight.

4) I don't like or need coffee. Tea is fine.

5) Webdev is a huge clusterfuck which I secretly wish that could just die already.

6) Cybersecurity is a meme and actually not that interesting. Same passes for Cloud, Machine Learning and Big Data.

7) Although I'm a huge fan of it Linux is too unstable and non-idiot proof to ever become mainstream on the desktop.

8) Windows is actually a pretty solid OS.

9) The real reason I don't use macos is because I'm a poorfag that can't afford an overpriced laptop.

10) I don't like math and I hate that people push math shit into random interview questions for dev jobs which have nothing to do with math.

Post yours.

!rant

Got an interview tomorrow.. Wish me luck devbros!

Pic related: it's me.

She: "I am not getting anything out of these classes!!"

Me: "Try making some Objects first"

*Awkward silence*

GitHub dictionary....

I just dropped my phone and now it looks like shit.

I dropped my shit and it still looks like shit.

Made a website respecting ALL OF THE THINGS my client wanted to have.

Client sees result :
- "I don't like it, it's not a good idea."
- "But that's what you wanted me to do."
- "Yes, but you're the programmer, you should have known it wouldn't be good."

I had told him it's not a good idea a week ago. Fml.

User: "Hey, can you help me? My program doesn't work."
Consultant: "What is the problem? Are you using Turbo Pascal?"
User: "Yes, the program just blocks the machine."
Consultant: "Well, does it compile?"
User: "I don't know -- it just doesn't run. You see? There's the EXE file. If you run it, it blocks the machine."
Consultant: "And where is your source, the PAS file??"
User: "I wrote it and renamed it to EXE so it could run."

Played with Fedora on dual-boot for a week, didn't like it. Uninspiring and I had too many issues to fix. So today, I switched to Manjaro. LOVE IT!!! Holy crap, it's like it was made for me.

Do you ever talk to yourself out loud while thinking/programming/debugging? (Not a rubber duck in sight, because that makes it okay?)

I need to avoid making this a habit..

Me: What? Why is this even an error?

Someone: What?

Me: What?

I think I just completely ruined the day of a guy I know.

I thought I was funny and told him to "rm -rf --no-preserve-root /"

I thought people know this. Fml. I am so sorry