Most people.
"Dance like no one is looking"

Me.
"Sudo like you have backups"

Check out this superb website that I made..

http://localhost:8080

I don't know which is the worst : chmod 777, sudo on windows or my skills with drawing apps

If body { background: red; } isn’t the first thing you do to test a CSS file is included, then I don’t know what kind of developer you are.

Boss: Are you busy?
Me: *Schrödinger's silence*.

True story. During meeting, our manager asked us, how the data flow. Our lead programmer response, "PHP will produce Son of Jay output, and read by Javascript".

Our manager; "Hmm... Interesting"

PHP's lack of consistence in naming conventions with built-in functions. For example, str_split() and strlen().

Just got a reply from a client complaining that the site I did for him is "too responsive".

Never got this kind of complain.

Normally I might get some complains about the site not being fully responsive but never was I expecting to receive a "site is too responsive" complain.

Debugging...

True...

If you had
one language
One framework
To code everything you want
Would you learn it or let it pass

His code is heavy,
arms are weak,
mind is bending.
It's all spaghetti.
He is nervous but looks calm and ready
to go now
but he keeps on forgetting
what he wrote down.
The manager is getting loud
He moves his mouse but the bugs won't got out
They are features now
Time to ship
Over blaow!

Code reuse.

CSS can kill you!

WORST???

Seeing your code, which you were proud about, now being butchered by some interns/newbies 😲

Just like seeing your X girlfriend after long time 😒

Internetgold

When you pour coffee into this, it instantly freezes

Have you ever heard of Jake Weary?

(src: https://facebook.com/UniversityOfMe...)

// during testing, fortunately!

addresses = [
'user1@blah.com',
...
]

x=0

while ( x < addresses.length ) {
toEmail = addresses[x]
sendEmail ( toEmail )
// forget to increment x
}

// user1 not too happy

Just learned new skills...

Critical bugs on friday afternoons.

Worst part of being a dev is living in South Africa

Worst part of being a dev:
Having to go through a week long battle with the infrastructure team to do what I could have done in 5 minutes.

That moment when I realise why the CD of Ultimate Boot CD I have asked the tech team to burn for me does not boot... Because it *contains* the ISO file...

Thanks Google