When you write your assignment in LATEX just because you're bored

Me: Phone at 13% better plugin to laptop
*few minutes later*
Phone at 5%
Me: WTF!
Laptop: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hello Weekdays

ccto

That one actually made me chuckle

I/O 2019

Now I know why I failed the employment exam

Amazing!🚀😂

It shows when it's time to rant

Is it just me or does this make you nauseuos too?

There should be a communist programming language.

- There are no classes.
- There is no inheritance.
- All code is executed simultaneously, since it's equal.
- All variables are global, since everything belongs to everyone
- There are no private functions
- Every function must have side effects, for the 'greater good'
- As soon as it is written, you no longer own the code
- Instead the code owns you
- And your machine

I slowly get why this thing didn't work out on society either.

Window XP things 😂

Wait... Why didn't anyone thought about that?

Under settings, we made a checkbox labeled “Run Program Faster”. The state was saved but it didn’t do anything.

We turned it “on” when people said things were slow. Usually they were happy and no one complained the “run faster” option wasn’t working.

Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.

"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"

"Uh... look at my beard"

"What"

"Just look at this beard!"

"Uh.... OK"

"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"

"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"

"You don't have to lie"

She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.

"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"

"Yeah"

"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."

She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"

Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."

Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.

Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"

"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"

Joanna: "No I already took care of it"

"How?"

"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"

Me: "I do miss shaving though"

Those LAN port splitter are getting out hand

Github after Microsoft purchase

* Selects text to copy *
* Ctrl + C to copy *
* Selects text to be replaced with copied text *
* Ctrl + C again instead of Ctrl + V *

Instant rage.

New devComic! Based on a funny rant by @AlgoRythm (https://devrant.com/rants/1168834/)

Dear gradle, no offense but I believe Rome took less time to build!

If you update your stack overflow question with the solution once you find it then you're the real MVP

Productivity level 10000...

School holidays be like:

"Yea! I finally have time to do projects that I like!"

When school starts again:

"How dafuq did I manage to do absolutely nothing in the past month?!?!"

My morning bowl of serial 😂😂

NSA: "We fucking love those guys"😂

Getting windows XP flashbacks

(Sorry for cellphone pic. Taking a screenshot cleared the screen)

guess who decided to update

So I found cowsay...

Me atm

Developer in a nutshell

Life becomes really hard when one of these go missing....