Life can be simplified with code. We're all running on an infinite loop. Eventually, we come across an unexpected bug and crash.

So, I found this on the internet

JSON Bourne

I have finished some docs for my project.
Going to bed.
GIANT insect in my bed.

I think i'll not sleep tonight...

I prefere the doc work.

- Getting paid to learn
- Testing new stuff everyday

Do nothing. Get paid.

If you know you're writing code that other people will have to work off of and you refuse to comment, can you at least have descriptive variable names so I don't have to spend an hour trying to figure out wtf something is. One letter does not make a variable name.

For a solid 5 minutes, I was wondering why the text color wasn't changing.

Sometimes I really hate being a dev.

Best advice ive had.. "fake it till you make it "

npm install good-nights-sleep

Our teacher asked us to write an essay. Since I'm not a native English speaker, I asked him if I could write it in English (essays are easier in English). He was cinfused at first, but said:
-You can write it in any language!
Guess who has an html/css essay

Things I've learned throughout my 5 - 6 years as a programmer.
- StackOverflow is full of assholes.
- CMS's are for weaklings.
- The best feeling about waking up in the morning is figuring out how to solve that error in your code.
- You no longer think about normal people things. Your mind is full of code.
- You're practically a computer.
- ALWAYS backup and save your stuff or you WILL regret it. Enable autosave if possible.
- RIP your social life (if your friends don't know squat about programming)
- Darkness is better.
- Being a programmer is amazing.

Ok. Decided to try out Zo. She really scared me!

How to write a CV!

Don't ever try writing code on a long flight. People LOSE THEIR SHIT.

The pain of explaining technical stuff to a non technical boss!!!

Started part time job at a company, had to log my time on timesheets. Said fuck this and now the whole company logs their hours on a custom web based time logging system which I built.

Logged into the vm as root. Saw that there were some security updates pending. Ran apt-get upgrade. Lost all ssh access to the vm. FML

I m Windows fan-boy but sometimes I have to say
Fuck u

:/
Project i got to work couldn't get worse
1)Legacy code
2)mathematical model based emulation
3)no proper comments
4)deadline approaching

Monday is Sunday

"The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated."
~Javascript

devrant need fa fa-davrant

Happy national ice cream day!

Motherfucking WordPress coupled with motherfucking sales people.

If you promise the client something, please fucking relay it via the correct process (i.e the fucking ticketing system that took me a month to write for the company - it's seriously just a click away on your desktop.). "I told your boss" is not a fucking apt excuse.

My boss forgets, and well, doesn't give a fuck about procedure either.

Now you phone my boss and he phones me, on a fucking Sunday evening, telling me that the client was promised a website by tomorrow morning at 10AM. You tell me this at fucking 9PM.

Why didn't you tell me earlier? How the fuck am I supposed to shit out something I would be proud of in a few hours? Nevermind me fucking up my sleeping routine; how the fuck?

Conversation went like this:
"xyz was promised this site by sales person fuckTwit, I need this live by Monday morning. I have sent you a few images. Make it in WordPress, client says they want a 'tangy looking theme'.

Me: it's a bit unrealistic requesting this, is there no way we can extend the time so I have time to create this?
Also, what do you mean by 'tangy'?

Boss: don't know. Make it happen. No excuses.

What the fuck is a tangy theme? When I become a webDev at the company? More importantly, fucking WordPress?!

Now I'm sitting on this shit, tired as a manatee in mating season, and using goddamn WordPress.

I have to halt my irritation, because I get severely irritated when I'm tired, I have to restrain myself from telling the involved parties tomorrow to install the FuckYourself WordPress plugin, coupled with a resignation letter.

Same sales person got me in shit a while ago, because I refused to give him access to the network to download fucking cartoons. Sales director went and moaned that his bitch (the sales person) needs this for a presentation. Yeah fucking right.
Go Snorkelling in a sewer truck you egotistic, megalomaniacal, indecent, outrageous, horrible motherfucker of a person.

Time to develop a fucking website with, oh, a company profile pamphlet.

Times like this I keep telling myself, "my time will come, my time will come".

I got my job because I've been myself. As soon as I laughed with the interviewers I knew I got it.

They choose you for a interview out of all the other CVs because they hope you know your stuff. Proof it! And most important - show your character. Don't be a blank paper! Make fun with them. Or at least leave some kind of positiv impression.

The funny part:
I applied for jobs in Austria while doing my Bachelor degree in the UK. Over Skype they had no idea I was wearing sweatpants.

Put some references like own projects in the letter or mention them in the interview.

Side projects what got me job three times. Move your lazy ass and work on your projects AND actually finish at least one 😒

Do side projects, even if they're small. If you already have completed side projects, show them off. Employers love to see your efforts and eat that up.

In some days I feel like the worst programmer in the world.

Someone feels the same?