Details
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AboutScript kiddie. For now.
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Skillsjs. vanilla.
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LocationMunich, Europe
Joined devRant on 12/7/2016
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I just remembered the first time I set up a Linux-Server. It was a simple Apache webserver at my first internship anf I didnt have a clue about literally anything.
My mentor guided me through and gave me literal step-by-step instructions (alright, now type... and now type...).
At the end he told me "OK, now run 'sudo rm -rf /*' to finish setting up". Me, being the naive and clueless motherfucker I am, happily nuked the everloving shit out of my newly setup server. I was like "Alright, WTF just happened??" He then told me "Now that you know how it works, do the entire thing again all by yourself. And you just learned an important lesson: NEVER exexute commands you dont know what theyre doing". I really did learn a lot on that day and still follow that lesson :D8 -
I'm making an interface where I have a few columns, much like Trello. In each column there are cards. I want the user to be able to drag these cards an place them in any column, in any order they want. The problem is that at the same time they should be able to sort each column on date or whatever. Do you guys have any ideas on how to deal with the clash between custom sorting and auto sorting? Like what happens when you're in date sorting, and you change the order of the cards?
The implementation/programming is no problem. I just need help to figure out the interaction logic behind it.
Thanks... :)5 -
trying to use flexbox when you have to support IE. fuck IE. fuck it. fuck it in the ass with a rusty pipe.8
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Literally what I do 80% of the time at work.
I am the only one that:
Knows CSS properly
Knows SCSS
Understands how to set up a proper front end workflow
Etc
Etc
Fucking etc
I AM the css dude at work and I FUCKING HATE working with CSS, at the same time I take it upon myself to push through the projects because my team is shit at it and I would rather work with it than to have someone else do it and then fix their shitcode.
As a whole....i dislike design. Badly.8 -
Oldschool CSS was not much fun, but I never understood how this made it any better:
<div><div><div><div><div><div>Bootstrap</div></div></div></div></div></div>
I always forgot a row, had cols inside of cols, forgot how form-groups worked, or found other ways of messing up the whole layout.
Instead of complex CSS, there was now this new complex language entirely expressed through the nesting of layers upon layers of divs. It was like LISP's brackets, but more verbose.
That was the moment I realized that fullstack is bullshit, that there are intrinsic talent differences between frontend and backend devs, and that it's OK to focus on a narrower but deeper field.8 -
Happiest moment of the week.
*Missed call from dad*
*Calls back*
Dad: I was gonna ask you about something, but I found it on duckduckgo.6 -
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet.
I studied Latin for 6 years in high school.
A dummy text is the link between my education and my job
°_°10 -
"The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair. " - Douglas Adams1
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Just got out a very short contracted call with the sysadmin, his job was to setup a windows server and the complaint was "we can't figure out why if we disconnect - the server is not accessible anymore and none of the services work".
I made him show me what he does and shortly after doing his regular checks HE GOES AHEAD AND PRESSES THE SHUTDOWN BUTTON.
Since it wasn't an actual windows server install, it didn't prompt or warn you at all, his thought behind this was "well I dont want it to run all the time, wasting power".
I feel also a déjà vu, as if that happened to me before, but I can't recall any time I would have had that exact situation happen.6 -
i posted a question 43 seconds ago. there is no way you can read this whole question in 43 seconds and i already have a -1 downvote on stackoverflow.
i feel like these fucking cunts just downvote out of boredom just because they feel like it15 -
Yesterday, my new (Irish) co-worker comes to my desk and asks me a question about an issue in his code.
His commenting all done in Irish.
Him: "If you want me I can translate the comments for you?"
Me: "Ní gá, is féidir liom é a léamh go foirfe." ("No need to, I can read it perfectly fine")
co-worker looking at me like: "wtf just happened?"
After a while, I spotted the issue (I noticed the expected output from one of the functions not being of the correct format - an integer instead of an array).
So I fixed it.
Next day (this morning) I came back at work, looked into my food drawer to see what I would eat for breakfast (yes, I have a drawer specifically for food, and yes, I eat breakfast at work), found a small box containing an Ulster Fry :D
Best breakfast at work in a long time :D6 -
Customer is always right.....
Committed to sustainable productivity..
Misunderstanding between the IT Department Staff member and the Finance Department Staff member in one of the establishments...
User: Hi, our printer is not working.
IT Service: What is wrong with it?
User: The mouse is jammed.
IT Service: Mouse? Are you sure it’s a printer, as they don’t come with a mouse?
User: Do you think I’m stupid? I’m telling you it’s the printer!
IT Service: I'm telling you, it can’t be the printer! They don’t have a mouse!
User: Oh really?... Mmmmm... I’ll send you a picture.
Scroll down...
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The customer is always right.
Listen to him/her and believe what he/she says.
Don’t jump into conclusions!12 -
Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.
"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"
"Uh... look at my beard"
"What"
"Just look at this beard!"
"Uh.... OK"
"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"
"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"
"You don't have to lie"
She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.
"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"
"Yeah"
"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."
She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"
Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."
Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.
Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"
"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"
Joanna: "No I already took care of it"
"How?"
"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"
Me: "I do miss shaving though"68 -
Assembly: He’s the nerd. He speaks very quickly and uses short sentences. Very few people talk to him. He’s considered to be an autist asperger by a majority of the class because he finishes the exams so quickly it’s insane and he faces a lot of difficulties in speaking with others. He’s at school but already dressed like an engineer.
Ada: She’s a foureyes nerd. When she gets the answer she’s doesn’t make any mistake. Ada often corrects the teacher when she writes a line a little ambiguous. She’s building a rocketship in her backyard and she’s always speaking about this weird hobby.
Python: He’s Mr Popular. He likes skate, brags about all the parties he’s invited to. He’s good in all the subjects taught in class but he’ll do them a bit slower than the others. Everyone loves him because he explainsthings so well, sometimes the teacher herself asks Python to explain some part of the course. He’s dressed with a hoodie, a baggy and glasses on the top of the head ;)
Java: She is one of the toppers of the class and very popular. She’s very good in all the topics. The teacher loves her but she’s a very talkative person.
Scala/Kotlin: They are twin sisters and the best friends of Java. Unfortunately, they are not as popular and it’s often Java who takes the lead in the group. It’s very difficult to distinguish one from another. Both are far less talkative than Java but Scala speaks a bit differently than Kotlin and Java.
C: He’s the topper of the class. He’s so fast in completing the exams that the teacher really thinks he’s copying Assembly’s work. He has a little brother C++ and they share a lot in common together. He’s the chess major and often plays chess with Assembly and his big brother.
Go: He’s the new kid on the bloc. He doesn’t like C++ and his friends and he wants to prove he can do better than them. Of course, he prefers playing Go over Chess.
APL: He’s a lonely guy. No one understands him when he speaks. Even the teacher is surprised when APL shows a correct answer after several lines of incomprehensible pictograms. People think that he was born in a foreign country… or a foreign planet ?
HTML/CSS: These twin brothers are very different. One is dressed in black and white and the other is dressed with everything except black and white. HTML is very talkative and annoying and the CSS is very artistic. CSS is the best student in Art lessons and HTML performs well in written expression.
LaTeX: She’s friend of HTML. The teacher likes her because she has a gift of writing. LaTeX likes the mathematical courses because she can draw fancy greek letters. The teacher knows this well and she is often asked to write a formula on the black board.
VBA: He’s in the back, looking through the windows. Not really interested in the courses taught in class. In the exams, he answers always with a table.
C#: He’s in the back playing yet another game on his smartphone. He likes being next to the windows also.
JavaScript: People often mix up Java and JavaScript because they have a similar name. But they are definitly not the same. Javascript spends a lot of time with HTMLand CSS. He’s as artistic as CSS but he prefers things that move. He likes actions and movies. CSS dreams to be a painter wheras JavaScript wants to be a film-maker.
Haskell: He’s a goth. Dressed up in dark. Doesn’t talk to anyone. He doesn’t understand why others write pages when he can write a couple of lines to answer the same question.
Julia: She’s the newest student here. She doesn’t have any friends yet but her secret aim is to be as popular as Python and as fast as C.
Credit: Thomas jalabert4 -
CEO: Can you make this and this
Me: Yes!
CEO: That's great, you can start working on that
Me: coding ... testing ... coding ... finished
CEO: Great it works, but can you explain to me what are the benefits of this
Me: ..... (why did you ask in the first place)8 -
I have this one friend who thinks he is a tech guru just because he plays video games a lot and started to study cs for one year. Now he got a job as sysadmin and it is funny to hear him brag about the job in front of non-tech people because he sounds like a CSI Cyber episode, just throwing tech words at the people and I know that he talks bullshit.
But I have to admit, he knows how to sell himself. Probably that's how he got the job in the first place because it cannot be his experience.
Yesterday he called me, to help him edit something on a linux server. I told him "To edit the file type 'vi FILENAME' and then you can edit. I have to go now, I have a meeting." :]22 -
I don't know how to React, the Vue of his Angular fin is quite... jQuery? Hmm...
Anyway, saved this little guy from the carnival and he is now enjoying a happy life with my other fish.
Do you guys have pets?18 -
Do devs really fight or do we just mildly assert differing opinions then ignore each other for extended periods of time?3