*In teams meeting with client*

Manager: Yes we can do all of that and it will be actioned very quickly. We will make all of these feature requests top priority. We will set aside everything we are currently working on in order to get this done!

Dev: ...Are you writing any of this down?

Manager: I don't need to, I always remember everything!

Dev: Just so you are aware, I'm not writing anything down. You're going to need to create a ticket with requirements spelled out for each one of these promises you're making otherwise they won't get actioned by the team.

Manager: I know that!

Dev: ...

*Later that day*

Ticket Title: Action client feature requests TOP PRIORITY!!!

Ticket Description: *empty*

Dev: ...

Every time that I read your rants I think to myself: There is no way that people can be such dumb morons.
On the other hand, you can’t make this up. It must be true.

> no deliverables/requirements in description

*marks as complete, nothing to do*

Do we just need to create a GoFundMe for you? I feel like this is a worthy cause so you can escape.

Leave!

Sure, the company will eventually die because of the insanely incompetent management. But then you just go to the next. So it isn't really your problem.

@MantisToboggan chaotic evil

@iiii lawful evil

@Lensflare fair

@Oktokolo Endless cycle of incompetency lol

@topsecret230 It is the same as the economic cycle of growth, crisis/war, growth, crisis/war...

Wait are managers responsible for this? On my team engineers do it all

@pandasama Not usually, he's supposed to table it at the planning portion of the scrum but he doesn't like doing that because we make him realise how vague his requirements are by asking questions and he very defensive usually ending in him throwing a temper tantrum and accusing us that the only reason we're asking questions is that we are lazy and don't want to work. Why not ask the client? He doesn't like me asking questions to the client because he feels it makes it seem like we don't know everything (no shit, that's why we're asking). He gets away with it because the client doesn't record what they ask for either and nobody ever gets held accountable for anything. It's only when someone senior on one side or another gets involved that all of a sudden everything kicks into action and by that I mean everyone points the finger at everyone else as to why nothing is getting done and we're told to "work better" but with no follow up or accountability.

Meanwhile I fix some bugs.

@Demolishun Haha! Other than dealing with this doofus my life is going extrodinarily well. Appreciate it though