Does anyone have job related nervous breakdowns/PTSD ?
I have ptsd symptoms related to php project i was maintaining, and i wonder if there is something wrong with me, or it's normal ?

I had some kind of breakdown last year, when they put me into another totally unorganized and unplanned project, with people who had no idea what they were doing, on top of the other 5 unfinished crappy projects I was working on at the time. My head just shut down and didn't want to code anymore under those circumstances. I just couldn't do this shit anymore. So I quit, took a few months off, and now I found another job in a company where we are only developers and the projects are awesome. All agile, for real this time, no marketing bullshit and no business bullshit and manager egos to handle. I'm having fun again. Sometimes you just need to get out of a toxic workplace and take a break.

Yeah it happens. I'm never going back to the country where I had my previous job.

Yes... but I think that was related to alcoholism and not php... kind of hard to suss that out after the fact.

Nothing severe enough for ptsd personally but it's definitely something that does happen

I remember a few projects a long time ago...

PTSD in the sense that I still cannot laugh about these projects and get nervous / extremely anxious / uncomfortable.

Code wise just one project.mostly because it was like @Root screwdriver.

A framework to generate for several different shipping companies the necessary data, routing and labels. International. Lovecraft's work couldn't have been better - it needed reflection to generate on runtime the necessary classes to adapt to the insanity of different information and label generation / data... And it was a solo project cause no one had time - btw.in PHP 5.4

It was one of these projects that I don't remember. I know what it does, I know that I wrote it... But code wise / workflow complete memory loss…which is rare for me.

The other one. Client and management. The client didn't cooperate and at the end didn't want the product, but contract was made so I was sent out to several meetings and we still coded the project despite it being declared dead. And the client was a mixture of insane dumbness and the epitome of arsehole management.

Both make me grind and bare my teeth as I get really angry remembering them.

Yes.

Screwdriver.
It’s been several months on the same project with endless changes and feature requests, and I am just so done. Boss is quite angry at me over it. Not my bloody fault, bossmang!

Hell
The boss/CEO of Hell was an abusive asshole salesman and would regularly demean, insult, embarrass, etc. me in front of the entire (small) company. He did this to others, too, but I was his favorite target. The guy hated me. His lawyer also tried to get me in trouble with the IRS by refusing to mail me my W2, and lying about it. I finally managed to get a PDF of it two months late (so five months after I was supposed to receive it). The company still owes me $5k (plus a retroactive contractual raise) despite my every effort to collect, including an attorney.

RealAsshole
Online casino I worked for. Guy had security cameras pointed at our computer screens, would watch them from his phone. A story he told to random people he networked with was that, when he worked for one of the major casinos, someone in the IT department made him angry so he “cleansed” (fired and replaced) the entire department. He screwed a player out of his house, and then bought it for cheap. He had rfid keycard readers installed at each door so he could monitor who came and went, and when. Mandatory exit buttons were installed on the fucking ceiling, no joke, and even more: disabled so he could better track us. They were also locked when the power was out, so a fire meant it was a death trap. And. All of the “THIS DOOR TO REMAIN UNLOCKED DURING BUSINESS HOURS” doors were locked with keycard readers, and had their disabled exit buttons installed on the ceiling. Also, he refused to pay you unless you bothered him about it for weeks. I once went two fucking months without getting paid. Oh, and I caught him trying to commit tax fraud. Reported him to the better business bureau, the fire inspector, and the bloody IRS — nobody ever listened.

God remembering these things makes me angry.

@Root Posting to read later while drunk. After skimming your post I think I’m in for a treat, especially the whole surveillance thing

@Root WTF!!! @Root ok I’m aware you’ve worked with dumbasses but TIL you’ve also worked with criminals. Slandering you to the IRS, tax fraud, not paying you FOR TWO MONTHS 😡👿 (TWO FUCKING WEEKS WOULD DRIVE ME INSANE), locking everyone in with extreme surveillance (I’m no law expert that sounds somewhat like kidnapping or false imprisonment). It really sucks such an intelligent woman like you faced so much abuse