This really resonated with me. The last job I had before doing my work as a full-time independent freelancer had all sorts of infantilization strategies. Parties, nerf gun wars, big lunch once a week, etc. I'm introverted and all of that stuff sapped my mental energy for the day, so my productivity suffered. It's daycare for adults.

https://nmn.gl/blog/...

Exactly. The GAFAM are literally retarded. They want to be your mummy / daddy.

Well, you can always say no, right? I have a similar experience. One day with 50 people and I'm drained as f.

@CaptainRant > "Well, you can always say no, right?"

I don't say 'no', there is always some emergency that pops up. Darn.

Example: This week we are having a department wide BBQ at a local park. There will be food, games, 'engaging conversations', etc.

I'm very, very seriously thinking about saying at the last minute (as everyone is getting up to leave), "I'll be there, I've got to stop by the DMV and renew my driver's license. Save me a burger, or five..ha ha ha." Drive in the general direction and come back to work. Everybody will gone for at least two+ hours.

#bliss

Then when they come back:

S: "PaperTrail, where were you? Did you get your license renewed?"

Me: "No, I waited in line for almost 2 hours, I knew I wouldn't make it to the BBQ. Sorry."

S: "No worries. Saved a couple of burgers in the break-room fridge."

If you're wondering, 'Has PaperTrail done this before?'. Yes ... yes I have.

@CaptainRant It was frowned upon to refuse to join in. “We need team players.” “We’re a family.”

I have a family. They’re at home and related to me. Ya’ll are just people I know from work.

@stackodev They always make those stupid statements, these corporate goons. No one is obliged to join events.

time to practice resistance against peer pressure pushing you into attendance.

but it also depends on the company culture - sometimes you need to attend these events, because the unofficial setup is where the actual business decisions and long term direction planning takes place

"recruit talent from top schools. Next, they must retain these recruits for at least 4-5 years" ... "watched friends transform from innovators to people who measure success by equity packages"

the article delibrately omits this is also the time people start family and get mortages, so it's no wonder they prioritize money and security over the unstable innovator startup mindset

@PaperTrail > "This week we are having a department wide BBQ at a local park. There will be food, games, 'engaging conversations', etc."

Update: Let it slip that we had this BBQ-thing to my wife (I was trying to be nice and offer to run errands over my lunch for her, and she got suspicious) and she flipped her lid (I've got to stop being so anti-social..blah blah..etc...etc)

Attended...it was fine..did end up having some engaging conversations, learned some stuff.

*sigh* ...stupid social anxiety.

Side note, there was a *ton* of left over burgers & brats, buns, cheese, brownies/cookies

Mgr1: "Anybody want this stuff"

Crowd: "No....not me...no....No, I'm full"

Mgr2: "Throw it away, I'm not dealing with it"

Mgr1: "Yea, me neither."

Me: "NOOO!!!...I'll take it! All!"

Mgr1: "You want the chips too? Soda? I don't want to haul it back"

Me: "YES!"

I'm sure I seemed like a homeless man in the back of Dairy Queen, but there was probably $100+ of food they were throwing away.

Bueller... Bueller...

That's correct, Wendy. We all wear masks.. metaphorically speakingggg.