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DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T LIKE LONG STORIES. ALSO DON’T EVEN BOTHER INTERACTING IF YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BE NEGATIVE.🙂
How should I start… Because I am a socially awkward dumb a**, I have trouble talking to literally everyone, even my close friends. One of which in particular that (I think) I have liked for years, but I’m too dumb to know for sure so I confessed to them to figure it out, and, like I thought, they rejected me, but I didn’t really feel anything, so I was like, “Oh, guess I don’t like them then🤷,” and things were fine even afterwards (this was a while ago btw.) But even if I am socially awkward, I at least try to wave or say hi to my friends when I see them. In relation to this, recently I have made a habit of saying hi to that one close friend in particular, and I don’t know much about my feelings, which means I definitely won’t know much about other peoples’ feelings, but it looked to me like that friend felt a bit uncomfortable whenever I said hi. Now, hitting me like a wrecking ball (lol), I realized, I probably love them. (Which is a completely new concept for me.) Which made it hurt ALL THE MORE when I asked my friend about their apparent discomfort, and got the answer I was hoping I wouldn’t. This friend no longer felt like we would be a good fit. The friend said that they don’t feel our vibes match (something like that), which I guess makes them not want to talk to me as much either, but we could still check in with each other occasionally. I told them, and meant, that I COMPLETELY understand, because I mean, who would really want to be friends with and talk to someone that barely talks themselves and barely makes an effort to make new friends or talk to other people? A friend that never comes and hangs out at their house or that doesn’t even like going out? But it hurt nonetheless. It confuses and hurts me that this friend doesn’t really want to talk to me but also apparently cares enough to not completely cut ties with me. I’m not mad at them in the slightest, but what am I supposed to do? Completely forget my feelings for them and the, albeit meager, memories we’ve made together as friends, but also keep them close enough to be at least acquaintances? I don’t think I can or want to do that, but I guess it’s not my choice now. I have to try.

Comments
  • 2
    @aviophile You do not have to read if you don’t like long stories. Also, do not comment if you didn’t read/if you’re just going to be negative. Thank you. (Btw I’m not angry. Just saying.)
  • 3
    I think you need more help than you are going to get on here. To start with you need to start loving yourself, if you don’t and try to get that elsewhere you will only get rejected as you come across as needy and hard work. Seek professional help and it will change your life. There is nothing that can not be fixed. Maybe try this?

    https://sensa.health/self-esteem/
  • 3
    What I think is happening is that you are on the first step to start figuring out your own feelings, thats why you actually felt hurt, and while that can be hard, it’s necessary in the long run.

    If you cannot feel hurt its hard to be really happy, the contrast it what makes the happy moments happy.

    I have been rejected and yes it hurt but after that I also learned and got better of noticing others feeling resulting in me meeting my spouse to be about two years later.

    As said, it could be good to actually seek help from a professional, they can help you speed up the process and avoid mistakes and if your friend still stays around you can still be friends and who knows what the future holds.

    They might in time change their position or you might catch they eye of someone else.

    The most important is to not give up, the future might not become exactly what we imagined but it can also be much better that we ever dreamed about.
  • 4
    explicitly saying "no negative reactions"? - well, if there ever was a reason to downvote something out of principle.
  • 1
    i feel like I was in a similar situation before, though I'm not *that* anti social. But I did propose to someone in the past and it made things awkward for a while.

    I was devastated for few weeks and still depressed for few months and made sure to always be nice to that person and maintain some friendship, but it felt weird.

    Though eventually I was just too fed up with my self for being so depressed and got my shit together and started living again. I actually found someone else who I truly fell in love with and my friendship with the other person completely healed as time went by. It's a somewhat long process, but there's no need to despair. If they don't feel the same towards you as you do towards them, then you really have no other choice than to respect that and move on. It'll stop being weird eventually
  • 0
    i feel like I was in a similar situation before, though I'm not *that* anti social. But I did propose to someone in the past and it made things awkward for a while.

    I was devastated for few weeks and still depressed for few months and made sure to always be nice to that person and maintain some friendship, but it felt weird.

    Though eventually I was just too fed up with my self for being so depressed and got my shit together and started living again. I actually found someone else who I truly fell in love with and my friendship with the other person completely healed as time went by. It's a somewhat long process, but there's no need to despair. If they don't feel the same towards you as you do towards them, then you really have no other choice than to respect that and move on. It'll stop being weird eventually
  • 0
    @aviophile
    TL;DR
    OP is socially awkward because he reads too much into things.
  • 3
    Tldr: an introvert(unpleasant one also) wants to fuck of his/her friends anf gets friendzoned.
  • 0
    Could've sworn this platform was called DEVrant.

    Downvoted.
  • 0
    @helloworld @helloworld I’m not looking for help, just ranting. And also, I do love myself. I think😭
  • 0
    @Voxera I’ll take this into consideration.
  • 0
    @tosensei When I say that, I don’t mean people can’t comment their own opinions. I mean I don’t want to see stuff like “BOo, gEt oFf ThE sTaGe” or “YoU’Re so DuMb ShUt uP.”
  • 0
  • 0
    @electrineer Actually, I don’t think I read that much into things. Frankly, I’m pretty sure it’s because I find myself hating and loving humanity at the same time.🙃
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Don’t hold back. I’m curious about what else you have to say.
  • 0
    @aviophile Oh no. I don’t really have thoughts about wanting to fuck people😭 And I knew I was gonna get friend-zoned, because I kinda tested this out before with them. I’m upset, not about getting friend-zoned, but the fact that this person later wanted to literally just stop talking to me.
  • 0
    @e1p5yKon9r0O Yeah, the purpose is to rant, right? You can downvote if you want.
  • 1
    @WhoAmIAgain so what if someones opinion honestly _is_ “BOo, gEt oFf ThE sTaGe”?
  • 0
    @tosensei Well idk, it’s their opinion, but in this case also a bit unnecessary.
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 I’m curious about your opinions, but I don’t like unnecessary negativity. Basically spreading hate just for kicks.
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Finally. I was so bored waiting for your next comment. Also, I didn’t say your comment was unnecessary negativity🤷
  • 0
    @WhoAmIAgain And as I said, unnecessary negativity, by my standards at least, is spreading hate just for kicks.🤷‍♀️
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 I already said I didn’t say your comment was unnecessary negativity😭 I just wanted to know your opinions and answered your questions😭
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Also, are you mad at me? Because I promise I’m not mad.
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Well, thinking about it deeper (because I really wasn’t before), whenever someone says their opinion, no matter what it is, it’s their opinion, which wouldn’t really make it negativity. However, if people really perceived everything non-factual/logical as just an opinion, the negativity or positivity of a statement would be irrelevant, but that’s not the case🤷‍♀️
  • 0
    @WhoAmIAgain Saying stuff like “You’re just mad ‘cause you’re ugly,” would be unnecessary negativity (in my book) because the person just said what they thought instead of what was relevant.
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Everything you said is probably true lol, but I barely feel like trying anymore.😭
  • 0
    @TheCommoner282 Got you.👌 This was fun lol.
  • 0
    Wait... Are you even a dev?
  • 0
  • 0
    Ignore the dude above, I can’t even fathom where that came from. Talk about kicking someone while their down.

    If you need to see someone to talk it out, or pursue a future plan I’d recommend BetterHelp. The app.
  • 0
    @peapowder I’ll check it out. Thanks👍
  • 1
    HealthyGamerGG on Youtube has some really good videos about widespread psy issues and how to handle them:

    https://youtube.com/@HealthyGamerGG...
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