Is there any instructions videos or a book on how to handle managers or other people with severly diminished mental capacity?
Whatever I say gets missinterpered, I had an argument with the teams tattletale so now every step that could someway be interpreted wrong is an big issue that needs to be discussed and solved -> enter missinterpered...

I know when it seems like when the world suddenly doesn't make sense or is out to get you it's most often the observer that has changed but I've twisted and turned all variables (including myself) and realized that I'm in a fucked up situation.

Thanks for letting me vent a byte

Being worse than my suck up of a colleague is not an option as I still illudes myself that I have some standards.

No Hard Feelings Book

https://goo.gl/search/...
No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work, Book by Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy

@2Fdev2Ftcsh question is: is the misinterpretation a case of missing knowledge or missing time?

Missing knowledge - is your (negative) comment "diminished mental capacity" a reference to a lack of understanding? Then you should prepare for the meeting. When you want something, the other person needs to understand what and why. Just saying : I want it won't do.

Missing time - 5 min talk for something important is too few. Make an appointment, prepare yourself. Think about explaining the topic (missing knowledge) to someone who doesn't have a clue.

I don't want to make you mad...

But you cannot expect someone to understand stuff he might never heard of before. Even less when he heard of it - but with all the wrong facts and details.

Especially non technical managers can be problematic as they lack a filter.

When the shittiest dev told them for 5 years this is the right way... And someone suddenly pops up and gets angrier by minute while explaining that this is wrong... Well... I think you'll get what I mean?

This raises eye brows. And certain red flags. Calm, rational and explaining why what how is the way to go.

If this doesn't apply to you, sorry. But give it a though or two, please.

Communication is bidirectional.

Yep there is a communication problem with me and my manager, it's my 7:the one in my 15 year career, the others were "end of a joke" capable at least. Current one (rather new to me but older than me) just blow off the scales in incompetence according to me.

But I'm still in the anger part from our last meeting, there is still negotiating, depression and acceptance left for me to experience, but for the anger part this is a nine outlet 😜

Lol, you made my day. I have same. I'm saying "let's agree on a generic solution first, and then think about solving exceptional cases", and my manager claims that I am not taking exceptional cases into account.

And there's more like that