32
NoMad
4y

Round up kids.
I have a story to tell. The story of a war I've lost. Many battles were fought and many hours were wasted.
This is the story of wasp in a computer lab.

Today, the weather was good. So your old pal, Nomi, decided to open the windows. And as usual, that's where it all started.
So Nomi sat down and worked for a few hours. Tweaking two different neural nets, adding to its dimensions and concatenating the living shit out of the data they were supposed to process. After, she tried testing and testing and testing. It was early afternoon at this point and she was hungry. She went to close the windows and go for lunch.... When she realized, that she's not alone in the room. A big ass wasp was sitting on one of the curtains.

Now, Nomi doesn't have a good relationship with bugs and flying shit. Wait, no, she doesn't have a good relationship with moving things in general. So she panicked. She begged the wasp to leave. The wasp sat on the curtain and smirked at her. So after a while, she left the windows wide open, turned off the lights, put her hoodie on and went for lunch.

(btw, at this point my hoodie smells of sweat, fried onion, steak, cigarette and shisha. Don't ask. It was a long two weeks)

When she came back, the wasp was nowhere to be seen. So she assumed that the wasp got tired and left. But oh, how wrong she was.

After few hours, she heard something. She assumed it was just a fly. Actually, she hoped it was a fly and not the return of the wasp. But all her hopes were in vein.

She heard a buzz. And all of a sudden, an angry wasp flew in her direction. She dodged the attack and got under the table. But the wasp was not letting this go. Nomi jumped out of the room and left the door open. The wasp hid itself. She waited and waited but no sign of wasp. So she ran back in the room, and opened the window and ran back outside. She waited. The wasp occasionally would fly from one hideout to another. The wasp was making herself comfortable. At one point Nomi got angry and threw a shoe at the wasp, but the wasp caught the shoe and threw it back at her while maniacally laughing at her.

So she gave in. This was enough for the day. She ran back in, closed the window, turned off the computer, took her bag, turned off the light, and closed the door. All in less than 15 seconds. She came outside panicked and distressed, and now she's on her way home hoping that by tomorrow the wasp is gonna be dead.

The wasp and the robots are sitting alone in the lab tonight. I hope when the robots uprising happens, the robots can forgive me for abandoning them powerlessly with a wasp. 😟

Comments
  • 14
    Best anime plotline I have read as of late. 10/10 the wasp becomes a mecha Pilot for season 2
  • 5
    @Lyym season 2 coming tomorrow, if the wasp doesn't find its way out or die.
  • 7
    @NoMad Nomi's Adventures Episode 2:The Waspenning
  • 2
    @Lyym 🤣🤣🤣
  • 1
    I've learnt to just command wasps out: https://devrant.com/rants/2594502/...
  • 1
    @Fast-Nop which language did you use?
  • 1
    I have a 9 minutes movie with small fly cleaning itself after having bath in the drop of water in the sink.
    Only cause I couldn’t sleep.
    If you wonder what’s over the fly it’s a slice of zucchini.
  • 0
    @vane maaaan, wasps are terrorizing. I wish it was just a bee.
  • 2
    @NoMad I've started with German ("Abmarsch!"), but also tested English successfully ("get out!"). Along with pointing to the open window.
  • 2
    So you know, this is why we have guns here. 🐝🔫
  • 3
  • 2
    This is exactly how I would handle this kind of creature from hell if it found a way into my room.

    Also, the wasp most likely won't be dead by tommorow, so I would plan some sort of attack before hand. In my coutry, you can buy this big-ass spray that kills monster like these almost instantly and it has about 5m range. Hopefully, you can find something similar where you live.

    Good luck, you are gonna need it!
  • 0
    @lamka02sk well, even if alive, it will be low on energy because there's nothing to eat in the lab. So I may try to open the window again tomorrow and let it out. If it doesn't, imma grab a rolled up magazine and imma be on a killing spree.
  • 1
    I was at the edge of my seat the entire time
  • 1
    Fried onion, steak, cigarettes and shisha

    Can't judge any of these to be honest
  • 0
    @yowhatthefuck that'd be fun! just grabbing a can of bug spray could kill that bug.
  • 1
    When all else fails, punch your own heart out to activate the tiny nuke that other scientists who wanted the wasp dead implanted in your body, and set to explode upon your tragic death in combat.

    Pepper in some "Let me show you the true terror that is humanity" to add an emotional bang to the normal bang.
  • 1
    How to deal with wasps 101:

    > Put a plate with sugared water somewhere away from you.
    > wait foe wasp to find it, don't worry, they will figure it out within a few minutes.
    > wait until they get to it and start drinking.
    > get your camera and start making pictures/videos.
    > wasp will fly away very happy, will leave you be and you have honored life and nature in the kindest way.
    > profit from happy mood.
  • 3
    *entered the room*
    no wasp found so far. 🤠
  • 1
    @NeatNerdPrime For a moment I thought we were preparing to blackmail the wasp into leaving us alone...
  • 0
    @theKarlisK OMG THAT'S SO CUTE!
  • 0
    I’ve been picturing this but with a “White Anglo Saxon Protestant” this whole time.
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