AGILE IS FUCKING ANNOYING AND A TOTAL WASTE OF TIME.

PERIOD.

No it's not. Most people who say that are just doing it wrong. Fight me.

oh wow. i thought the whole point of agile was not to waste time

@Azer0s I’m with you

Well your're big caca head change my mind

I have a love/hate relationship with it.

May be a waste of time at first glance but you'll be thankful in the end. Saves you much stress and pain

Makes sense to me but I work remotely and I don’t hear much from my coworkers except from chat, mail and daily meetings.
Any form of communication is better then no communication.

Forced agile with forced daily when all of you work in one room, got no client on meetings don’t make sense for me either. Kanban or any ticketing system and quick planning is enough in such situations.

Some people just don’t understand that agile is about not to waste time. They want to waste more time to be “agile”.

@Azer0s
Some select few have mastered it and gotten good out of it, doesn't mean everyone should be the sheep in the herd and follow them. Mostly it doesn't work and in those companies its a pain in the ass.

@dontPanic
You bring in agile, only when your other practises are tried, tested and are working like a well greased machinery. Otherwise you are just introducing useless standups, retros and jira tickets and estimations in your existing fucked up system.

@ganjaman
I agree with you, no need to change anyone's mind here. Not yours and definitely not mine, a caca one.

@C0D4
Hate all the way for me. Not a single good thing has come out of it until now.

@Snob
It's been more than 9 months with me in this system and I can safely say, it has caused me more stress if nothing else.

@bitsnpieces In this case I'd like to quote @Azer0s ... "You are doing it wrong"

@vane
Syncing up with your teammates is not agile. That is a requirement and should be practised everywhere. But the rest of the machinery and the compulsions around it is what really grinds my gears. Like at my workplace, you have to be there at the said time for the standup everyday, even though you might be dealing with heavy ass traffic, just because the managers/leads want to know what you have been upto and then they fuck off for the rest of the day.

@bitsnpieces interesting...because it worked flawlessly in every company I worked at (even if it was the only thing that worked).

@Azer0s
You will really get to know my pain once you see how bad your work life can get fucked up when its implemented badly. There could be a million reasons to put you off of your work, this one is at number one in my list.

@bitsnpieces just saying...this has never happened to me before

When agile is implemented badly this is the result (read this as my experience)

1. Do scrum meetings and sync ups with people who are literally sitting at an arm's length from you for the entire day.

2. Keep creating tickets and giving estimations for constantly changing requirements and approaches.

3. Work in the bounds of sprints, minor major releases and instead of dedicating your precious time to work, keep updating some random documents and CRFs.

4. Point 2, 3 should be the job of your scrum master, who is drawing a fat check for literally doing nothing. His job is basically to tell you what you need to do apart from actual work.

@bitsnpieces well syncing with everyone is agile. I got 5-10 minutes meeting, also with customer developer so we’re clear about what to do and we can ask about functionality as we do it so when we do something different way then expected we don’t waste time.

Management, architect, analyst, all this shit is not agile by definition.
It’s just forced agile to be trendy and it’s just causing frustration because you got less time to do your shit.

Anyone should be able to attend daily and anyone within team can run daily.
I got no manager on daily cause it’s for developers and we agreed to have them at 2pm my time so no one complain.

Some people are agile by definition and it’s no different what word you put to describe way of work.
Other are just assholes that want to shit on you all the time so you work for them and they gather all the prize.
Fuck them.

@Azer0s
Hope to god it never happens, because I won't wish this even on my enemies.

@bitsnpieces I really don't like to repeat myself. "You are doing it wrong".

@vane
Couldn't have put it better man. On point.

Fucking "Agile Experts" coming and introducing all kinds of shitty practises and methods and then blaming the devs for not putting full effort in work.

YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME ENOUGH TIME TO WORK ON MY SHIT YOU ASSHOLE.

@Azer0s
I don't want you repeating because I got your point.
Also, I don't know how it looks like when its actually implemented correctly, so if it were upto me, would definitely remove it in the blink of an eye.

But alas, if you want to keep your job, you need to move along with the herd, even though you can clearly see everyone is going to fall in the valley.

@bitsnpieces or you research the topic a bit and educate your coworkers? I recommend Jeff Sutherland's talks.

@Azer0s
Coworkers are with me on this, its the upper management who are as adamant as their old grumpy selves usually are at their age. And no, I am too low on the food chain to actually make an impact because I have tried suggesting some things which were not related to agile, but they fell like mere noises on their dead ass ears.

So I have officially given up now. Bringing in the revolution of change? Nah, let someone else do it. I'll just rant about this shit.

@bitsnpieces Rant and migrate elsewhere.
That always seems to be the answer.

my experience is as a consumer of some things developed using agile, and features randomly breaking, documentation being constantly out of date or for a prior version, especially when business processes rely on them gets old quick. there's a reason big companies will still use software from the 1990s.

agile done poorly is worse than not doing agile at all. and as a consumer of buggy ass products, it colors my perception of agile itself. if the process is easy to do wrong then it's a bad process.