I work with a lot of people around the world, since 2 years ago almost.
My english is really BAD and I dont understand why is too difficult to my improve it.
Is very difficult to my write, speak and listen in english.
I really have a problem?? My mind comes white when I am in a meeting in english. I feel like a durp turtle...

You live in the age with the most knowledge easily available.

Find an online course or something to help you.

And if it helps, I never learned proper English until I was around 16, and it's the only language I speak.

Listen what are they talking about often and more practice, I never learn English anyway, just the way it goes. Once I got interviewed in English and that's not that bad. English not my mother tongue but English not that difficult, at least you can express what you mean without body gesture. My English still bad until right now.

Unlike Russian, it's hard enough, I'm not able to speak it out. Just read what I mean in Russian they got understand

Couple tips that might help you, watch series/youtube in English, music, change your phone and computer language to English, get out of your confort zone and get dirty with the language, when you are talking to yourself trying to defuse a problem or something, do it in English as well, get curious, don't rely on a corrector to tell you what's wrong, if you are confused about how to say/write something google it 1000 times if you have to(I just had to translate rely because I forgot how to spell it), that has helped me a lot, never received any education to learn to speak/hear/write English and struggled a lot with it, also, don't try to speak like a native, it's enough if people can understand what you are trying to say. Also dont expect it to change fast, it's a proccess of adaptation, and believe me you will get used to it if you can speak your native language without problem, if you have issues with your native language however you might want to look for professional assistance.

Read books in english.

Apart from all the above, just practice it. You can take all the courses you want, but the moment you have to maintain a conversation with somebody you'll realize how important it is. The thing is, if you've done all of the above, just having conversations with people will improve your English a lot in not that long.

@rgomez All of that you said is true.
I think that the most difficult part is the learning frustration, but I have a lot of motivations to continue improving and maybe need to change my mindset to focus on it

@ethernetzero Yes, the conversation is a reason to download this App.
Because I have probles making sentences or trying to express something throught text or talking. Usually I'm a receptor in conversations.