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My colleague is worse. He spent 3 weeks trying to solve a basic problem. In the end I just did it all for him today and it took 2h.
This genius needed to bring back a model with an array inside it as a property for things that entity owns. He brings that back to the controller, the. For some reason replaces that property with every single entity of that type in the database whether it owns it or not, then goes trough them all with a loop and adds a new property dynamically to say if it should actually be there or not.... The data was already there to begin with. -
@craig939393 hahahahahaha ahhhhhh love that. Like unlocking the door so you can check your house for your keys lool.
Okay, I'll raise you an idiot.
Same guy, all he has to do is: Download a xml, insert the data into staging, then insert into the table for the current month (and obviously don't if already there).
Coooooool. So what do we do? I know, let's do everything perfect and just before the insert, truncate the table!!!
"Why?"
*Blank Stare*
"We're gonna have to go outside for 5 mins....."
Explain why he's doing it wrong, that it has a date column, why would you truncate? He understands, cool, we discuss and design the solution. Even write code, basically done.
*1 week later, because I'm not finishing this, you should be able to and I'm not your manager, give a fuck*
HE'S NOT DONE AND STILL TRUNCATING -
@CodeBane So it's war you want.
OK so my guy, I write a model driven front end with a script that converts all the api models into their typescript versions. front end literally deserialises api model responses into their typescript versions and sends them into model driven angular components.
He tells me that he is annoyed that his backend models have to actually contain the data they need now and that the front end is now driving the back end. OK. He used to just send down all records of all types and build a single types children using Ids... No entity framework relations used.
He also was not able to figure out how to do string concatenation. He needed to insert a variable between two others and couldnt figure out how so asked me how to since I am the front end expert...
I also had to teach him what Json is before I could explain valid json and he has 8 years experience. -
@craig939393 daaaammmmnnnnnn son, sounds like you had fun on a daily basis. My idiot was like a grown child idiot, yours just sounds like a grown idiot hahaha.
I would have lost my shit arguing over normal shit vs his backwards ass bullshit but string concatenation would have had me in court loool.
Think I have to fold, I mean my idiots were special but the worst is the kind that thinks they have knowledge.
I'll give you a bonus tho, my guy, forgot what task he was given, find out how the job history table works in SQL and increase its retention policy. Cool.
Why is it he tells me he can't run something. Come over and he's got some huge script...uh, what is that? "Gives me jobs".
Look through, I see all kinds of database changes, flip all the way out. Tell him not to copy things from the internet unless he knows wtf they're doing. Knew he was idiot before I even set up his accounts, he looked like one tbh, so I never gave him permission to do anything but selects lol.
Teaching new recruit some SQL (even though hes supposed to fucking know SQL and have multiple years experience but I was a contractor and idgaf, not messing up my money. Just fucking annoying to have an idiot around you all the time).
Me: Okay, so sys tables, so this one is for jobs yeah?
Him: Yeah
Me: Okay, so in this table, its obviously not one row per job per step cos you have multiple rows for the same job and step. Also, there is a datetime field, so what is it showing?
Him: Hmmmmm..... (after some time, back and forth we get to the answer).... history table
Me: Cooooooool, okay, so, lets say, I have a job with 5 steps. If i run it once, how many rows will be in this table?
Him: 5 rows.
Me: Correct, so if I were to have run this same job, 10 times, how many rows get inserted into the table?
Him: (Now...you have to understand, how long this thought process was, im trying to fill the gap with words but really, he was like, having a flashback or something...I kept quiet but silently wanting him to say anything....then he looks me dead in the eyes).... 10!
Me: Motherfucker what!?!? 10 What? If 1 time == 5, what does 10 times ==?
Him: Hmmmmmmmmm.... (yes...we are doing this whole flashback montage all over again)....... Ohhhhh, 1!
Me: .....Stop, think, its a history table. It holds history, for when every step is run for a job, why would it be only one row?
Him: OMG, I know what a history table is!!!!
Me: (Pissed off cos I don't take disrespect calmly). Fine, genius, answer, go!
Him: (LONGER WAIT THAN LAST TIME!!!!)....is it not 10?
Me: I swear, I'm gonna kill you one of these days.
Him: *chuckle*
Me: No...seriously....
TOOK 20-30 MINUTES FOR HIM TO SAY 50!!!!!!
And even then, I swear he didn't understand why. Serious, he was a special breed, had a manager that was a super tard and when I worked here, the spirit of that manager possessed this idiot, the CIO and his little right hand bitch zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
If there was ever a time I was willing to catch a case at work, it was there.
Bonus: Serious, it got to the point I had to come in and tell this idiot that he can only ask me questions today if he calls me by my name...and my name has changed today...and no, you can't ask me for it cos you need my name to ask me questions.....FUCK OFF kkthxbai.
rant
wk125