What to do when you only think about suicide...
I'm so frustrated about my situation... 3 years with a burn out, My boss keeps treating me badly, no one cares enouf to help, can't go to the owners of the company or else my dad will turn his back on me,...

So saturated
So tired of only suffer
No personal life
On my limits...

One more and I may just cut my rists in front of my jerk boss just so he won't forget of what he did to me...
Saw Start wars Ep VII yesterday... that scene with a bloddy hand on a storm trooper's helmet cames to my head everytime I think about it lol

Wish I had no family... so I wouldn't feel guilty and just get on with it.

Sory for the sad post... have to trow it out and I only trust devrant to do it.... (and not having 20 people following me and never leaving me alone)

Don't make decisions in anger or depression.

The harder you fall the higher you bounce.

(I'm pretty bad at this) ☺️

Man, don't say that... you are not alone!
Think about how you can change this situation. Trust me, you can! you are not trapped in your personal hell

I engulf myself in work just so I can hide from myself.

we're not crazy, we're not the odd ones out, we're just all going to shit from the inside and maybe we should talk about that more.

Why will your father turn his back on you if you leave your job and find another one? For years I thought that I needed to work at the family business because I couldn't find a better job. Then I found a job and started to spend less and less time at the family business. And then I found a better job and then a full time development job. Now I only hang out at the family business for a couple of hours each day. My point is, jobs come and go. If you don't have children you can afford to be unemployed for a while.
(Sorry if the above don't apply to your situation, I won't pretend to understand what you're going through)

Going to the gym is my coping mechanism for depression I just put it all on the weights till I am too tired to feel anything. I know it's not the healthiest thing to do but it has helped me get through tough times.

PS:-dont think about ending it dude stay strong here's a ++ bomb hope it will cheer you up

Burn out is a tough one to cope with but remember it's not permanent either.

We are all here if you need to chat.

@thevariableman are you ++1 all my rants? that's not a bomb... that's a cluster fatman with autofire, thanks
I just got stoned....
It's my miracle remedy when I get so low... takes all the suicidle toughts ... well almost all, and leaves me with no reaction.
Don't really like to be stoned... but tomorow will be another day...
Unfortualy I get so tired that I don't have the energy to do any sports... even my beloved Airsoft.
Thanks for the suport, you made me smile.

You guys are great, Imaginative way to cheer me up.
That's one of the reasons I love Devrant community

Stay strong dude!

I never had those thoughts, but I did think about what would I do in that situation, if that makes any sence.
If you want to go out, go out with a bang, go somewhere, do crazy things you never had the guts to do, start a fight with your boss, tell your dad that he is terrible towards you, drop database, go on a rampage. What ever happens as a concequence can't be worst than suicide. Take a flight to a random destination, start your company, what ever makes your juices start flowing. And after you try all of that, and still feel like ending it, go ahead, but don't quit the game if there is still a chance to have fun.

No job is worth taking your own life. Consider quiting that job and tell the HR that your boss was the reason. You will get another job easily, the job market for programmers is good. And your boss will be left there explaining what he did wrong.

@Phoenix99 hm.... I want to make a lot of money so I can retire and never have to work again to pay the bills... But I haven't figured out how yet.... I have a lot of bills...

@Phoenix99 well actually I said work **to pay the bills.**

I don't mind working on my own terms and just for fun.

@billgates @Phoenix99 https://foreverjobless.com/my-story...
I think this guy did it

@RodrigoF glad to be of service

@1989 hey.
You wrote it for the same reason I did... To let it out... Tell someone.
Hope it gets better for you

Don't know why but the desktop app didn't show most of the replies yesterday... Sorry for the ones I didn't reply yesterday.

Well the problem with my father is his education...
I asked for years for a job on this company and he never helped... He tought me to get stuff by myself.
So I made a 2 years formation on cnc and as soon as the owner heard about it he asked me to come for a interview (best company owners I know, that's why I never made a formal complaint).
Problem is that the main boss (production boss) envies my family...
My brother also worked here Making robots a few years ago.
I know that what my boss did is illegal, but I would fuck the company if I made a formal complaint.
My dad would never acept if I damaged the company name.
Was expecting to be in a better mood today... But no. Have no reasons to get worst but it's just getting worst and worst.
I may commit myself soon to the psychiatric wing in the local hospital before I hit rock bottom.
Better then the alternative...
I could also live the company.. But fuck I got my life destroyed for this company, by this company. And can't go to another like this... No one will hire me the way I look (mix of zombie with a vampire with speech problems because of my nervous sistem).
Thanks for the support guys

@RodrigoF boss bad, owner good... Then just tell the owner, ie. Make an informal complaint?

I actually did that to HR, my former boss fckd me over so got transferred... To current team isn't exactly where I would like to be but the ppl r nice....

@billgates I've been trying to avoid that, because the boss is a childhood friend of the owner, so If someone gets fucked its me...
I'll write a complaint this weekend, explaining everything from the start and deliver it by writing.... Then I'll wait...
I'm getting so bad that I get huge overall physical pain. Could at least distract me, but noooo, only makes me more psichotic...
Lets hope I get a little better this weekend... I've been pushing my limits week by week, and everyweek seams that I reach my point...
Only to find out that I can take a little more, and a little more...

Well sorry, don't realy know what I'm saying/writing today

@RodrigoF You are in a pretty complicated situation. Try to explain to the owner (without blaming the boss) that you are feeling overwhelmed and that this is making you unproductive. If the owner is not stupid, he will know that unproductive employee == less money for the company. He will not fire you for this. If he does, he was planning it all along and was just looking for an excuse.
Realising that you need help (psych ward) is a very good sign, it means you haven't hit rock bottom 🙂. And know that, even if it's only for the few minutes it takes to write these comments, we care about you. (I chose to write here instead of browsing my beloved 9gag so this means a lot hahaha)

@RodrigoF probably better face to face to. You can write it down just to remember, clarify ur thoughts but if you're on good terms with the owner maybe go for more of a chat?